Dear Abby: Teacher’s Burden

Dear Abby: I’m a teacher, and I genuinely love my job and my students. However, as I approach the end of a 26-year teaching career, I feel compelled to share something. Each year, many parents request personal notes for their kids to include as epigraphs in their graduation books. They ask all the teachers to do this, and, while it’s a thoughtful gesture, it ends up being a considerable amount of extra work when I’m already swamped with paperwork.

I want to say this clearly: Please stop! I genuinely care about your children, and I’ve put in my utmost effort to ensure they had a fantastic year. I’ve tried to inspire a love for learning and help them navigate tough social situations, guiding them to grow as individuals. I’m not saying this to boast; rather, I need you to understand that I’ve already invested a lot in your kids. If you factor in the number of students I teach, this request adds a significant burden during a particularly stressful time. If you appreciate my efforts, there are other ways to show it. However, hitting me with more tasks at the end of the year just adds to déjà vu of being overwhelmed. Thank you, Abby. — Already overwhelmed in New York

Dear Overwhelmed:

I’ve prepared a letter to parents already, though some may have missed my column today. The solution might just be sending a reminder to these well-intentioned parents about the stress this time brings for you, so they might reconsider their requests.

Dear Abby: Stuck in a Toxic Relationship

Dear Abby: I have been with my partner for 25 years. Initially, things were wonderful, but then he fell into substance abuse, changing into someone I hardly recognize. Leaving isn’t an option for me; we both work two jobs just to make ends meet. He disrespects me, and though I’ve urged him to quit, he refuses. I try to keep the peace, but it’s draining. I’m considering moving out, but most of our possessions belong to me. What should I do? — Ready to leave through the east door

Dear Troubled One:

Consider making an appointment with an attorney to understand your situation better. Supporting someone with addiction only enables their behavior, and you shouldn’t feel obligated to do so. If you feel he poses a threat to your safety or your belongings, consider filing a police report and looking into a restraining order. With the right support, you can work towards removing him from your life. If you worry about his potential retaliation, think about installing a security system. For more assistance, reach out to the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit thehotline.org.