Tate Mannell, a sophomore at UNC Chapel Hill, is in his apartment kitchen melting butter in a pan as he prepares country-style beef ribs. For Mannell, who used to play lacrosse, protein is the star of every meal. He typically combines the beef with rice and Japanese barbecue sauce, making it a favorite dinner option. He started cooking for himself at 14, which was also when he began to focus intensely on his body size.
Unlike those struggling with anorexia, Mannell aimed to bulk up instead of slim down. Like many teenage boys, his motivation stemmed from sports. The experience of facing bigger, older players and the teasing from teammates contributed to his negative body image.
“It’s funny when your friends say it, but it still got into my head,” Mannell shared. “I’d be at the gym or sitting down for a meal, feeling reluctant to finish, and those comments like ‘twig’ or ‘skinny’ replayed in my mind. It pushed me to prove them wrong.”
Concerns around eating disorders and body image often overlook boys and men, yet many wrestle with the desire to gain muscle. Research indicates that close to one-third of teen boys in the United States attempt to gain weight, with about a quarter resorting to supplements, steroids, or increased food intake.
Mannell began to eat as much as he could and started taking creatine. At just 20 years old, he recalls putting on 40 pounds in a two-month span, though it wasn’t sustainable. He reflects on meals where he ate until he felt sick, only to repeat the process again later. During his junior year of high school, he hit the gym for two to four hours daily, engaging in weightlifting alongside lacrosse.
According to the National Eating Disorders Association, muscle dysmorphia—often referred to as bigorexia or reverse anorexia—is a form of body dysmorphic disorder. Individuals suffering from it feel they’re never sufficiently muscular, regardless of their appearance.
While Mannell hasn’t been diagnosed with body dysmorphic disorder, he often felt like he weighed 150 pounds, even though the scale read 210.
“It never really impacted my life in a serious way. I wasn’t depressed about my body image. It was more of a motivation like ‘I need to push harder,’” Mannell explained. “Though in high school, I definitely had moments where I felt ‘I’m small, I hate this.’”
The stereotype that eating disorders only affect women often leads to overlooked cases in men. A 2019 study highlights that around one-third of individuals with eating disorders in the U.S. are men. This bias can make it harder for them to seek help and receive diagnoses. Chantal Gil, clinical director at the Duke Center for Eating Disorders, noted that individuals don’t need a formal diagnosis to seek assistance.
“We want to avoid putting you in a box and creating barriers that suggest you need a specific label to get help. Some may feel they aren’t ‘sick enough,’” Gil stated. “If it’s causing you distress, reaching out is what’s important.”
She also pointed out that those with eating disorders or body dysmorphic disorder might appear healthy outwardly, despite the turmoil they face internally.
Zach Harding, a bodybuilder and personal trainer at Gold’s Gym Chapel Hill, experienced anorexia when he was 18, dropping to 100 pounds before turning to weightlifting. He started eating more to regain a normal weight, but it still revolved around improving how he looked.
“I might have seemed healthy, but mentally, I was still in that same space where it was all about appearance,” Harding remarked.
While exercise is a common behavior for those dealing with bigorexia, Gil advocates for it if the intention is right.
“If you enjoy going to the gym because it feels good and you love activities like yoga or running—fantastic. That’s what we want for you,” she noted. “However, it gets complicated when the focus shifts to changing your body in a very specific way, and it risks turning unhealthy when it becomes obsessive.”
When Harding works with clients, he emphasizes how their bodies feel and perform, a lesson he learned through his own experience.
His desk is adorned with bodybuilding trophies, and although he occasionally has off days, he insists he’s in a better mental space than before.
“The gym is fantastic, but it’s not everything. How are your relationships—both with yourself and others? With family, friends, loved ones?” Harding asked. “Fitness can quickly become an obsession, which can damage your relationships.”
Isolating oneself is often a sign of body dysmorphic disorder or an eating disorder.
Wehazit Mussie, a senior at UNC-CH and representative for a campus organization focused on body liberation, mentioned that Embody Carolina aims to combat that isolation by fostering community.
“When people come together in a space where others share similar struggles, it really makes a difference. It fosters a feeling of not being alone,” Mussie explained.
Embody Carolina seeks to promote awareness around eating disorders across campus, with Gil mentioning that the transition to college often heightens the risk for developing eating disorders. For Mannell, however, attending UNC and stepping away from lacrosse helped soothe his obsession.
He shared that in high school, being athletic felt cool, while at Carolina, the emphasis seems to be more on being kind and funny, which allowed him to shift his focus away from body image. Now, Mannell feels more accepting of his appearance, although he continues to monitor his workouts and diet—still taking creatine for workouts—but he’s moved on from where he was just a few years ago.
“I use about half a scoop of pre-workout now. Back in high school, I’d go for a double scoop, pushing 600 milligrams of caffeine,” Mannell recalled. “But, you know, I value my health. I’d rather not risk a young death, so I’ve scaled back. There’s just no need for it.”
