In 1978, Jack Merrill reluctantly enters the home of serial killer John Wayne Gacy. Unlike dozens of Gacy's other victims, Gacy left the house alive.
Merrill, who was 19 years old at the time of the kidnapping and rape, has since become an actor, appearing in bit roles on several television series, including “Law & Order'' and “Grey's Anatomy.''
Now he's starring in his own story, writing and planning to perform a one-man play called “The Save,” detailing that terrifying night with Gacy.
John Wayne Gacy's lawyer 'wanted to be seen as the bad guy', believes there are at least 20 more victims
Actor Jack Merrill has appeared in bit roles in several television series, including “Law & Order,'' “Grey's Anatomy,'' “Game People Play,'' and “Steve the Intern.'' (Michael Thalberg/Getty Images)
“When I was 19 years old, I was abducted and raped by a mass murderer, a man etched into the American consciousness: John Wayne Gacy,” he said. people magazine. “Oh, that guy from Chicago who dressed up as a clown and murdered 33 boys and young adults in his home and under his garage, and who authorities believe killed many more.”
The son of a respected sports reporter for the Chicago Sun-Times, Merrill said he grew up in a tumultuous household as the youngest of five children.
John Wayne Gacy poses for a classic mug shot at the Des Plaines Police Department. (Des Plaines Police Department/Chicago Tribune/Tribune News Service via Getty Images)
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“By the age of 19, I was working in clubs,” he explained. “I wanted to be an actor, but I didn't know what to do. I used to go swimming at the YMCA, and one night I was walking home after swimming and a guy pulled up and said, 'What are you going to do?' I said, “Do you want to go for a ride?” ”
“I tried to drive around the block a few times, but he suddenly started driving around and it turned out to be a really bad neighborhood. I said, 'Lock your door. It's dangerous.' When I said I didn't put it in the paper because it would hurt business on nearby Rush Street, he said, “How do you know that? You other kids.'' It's different from that.”
“I had never been in anyone's car before, but I felt that if he thought I was different from everyone else he had ever ridden with, I should stick with it.'' He pulled up near the Kennedy Expressway ramp and asked, 'If I've ever done 'poppers'–amyl nitrite, he pulled out this brown bottle and poured the liquid onto a cloth. He put it in my face, knocked me unconscious, and when I woke up, I was handcuffed.
The backyard structure and front lawn of John Wayne Gacy's home were completely destroyed during the investigation. (Walter Kael/Chicago Tribune/Tribune News Service via Getty Images)
Shortly after, he arrived at the now infamous Gacy home. “He told me to be quiet,” Merrill said. “The light from the back of the house hit his eyes and I suddenly realized how dangerous he was.”
“I knew he was crazy, I knew I couldn't fight him, I knew I couldn't make him mad, and I just had to defuse the situation, defuse the situation. It wasn't. I always acted like everything was okay.'' That's how I grew up, so I've been doing that all my life. ”
Jack Merrill recalls being drugged in John Wayne Gacy's car. (Greg Doherty/Getty Images)
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Meryl remembers thinking that if she fought Macy, she wouldn't survive. “I didn't fight, I didn't fight him. … I was 19 years old, a skinny kid. … I learned skills that I could use to not lose.”
Now 65, he remembers the house being “dark” and “feeling like a trap.”
“He asked if I trusted him and I said I did, so he took off the handcuffs. There was a bar in the middle of the house. We drank beer and He had a strong pot, and he removed the handcuffs, and he dragged me into the hallway, and this homemade device with ropes and pulleys went around my back and choked me as I struggled. “I was handcuffed to do this,” he explained.
“I knew he was crazy and I knew I couldn't fight him.”
Jack Merrill believes people wouldn't care if this same attack happened to him and it wasn't caused by John Wayne Gacy. (J. Vespa/Wire Images/Getty Images)
“At some point I did, and I started to run out of air. He put a gun in my mouth and then raped me in my bedroom. I knew I had little chance of winning if I fought him. I would never… I also felt sorry for him in a way, like I didn't necessarily want what he was doing, but we were there for hours. I finally realized that he was tired. Suddenly he said, “I'll take you home.”
“If this happened to me and it wasn’t [Gacy]no one will care. That's interesting to me to think about. Because there are a lot of other people that bad things happen to,” he said, “They're not interested in me. They're interested in the next thing. [Gacy]. I know that, and that's fine, but that's the strange thing about our society. ”
John Wayne Gacy mugshot taken in 1978. (Bureau of Prisons/Getty Images)
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Merrill said Gacy dropped her off around 5 a.m. near where they first met. “He gave me his phone number and said, 'Maybe we can meet again someday.'” When I got home, I flushed the number down the toilet and took a shower. I didn't report it to the police. I didn't know at the time that he was a murderer. ”
Merrill said he first tried to tell the story years ago but was dissuaded by film executives. Merrill remembers the person asking him, “Is that how you want to be remembered?”
“If this happened to me and it wasn’t [Gacy]no one will care. ”
That stalled his story-telling process, but it didn't kill him.
“One of my big messages on this is; [one-man]It shows me that I am not a victim. Something happened to me. “It was one night, and I made a promise to him that he would control me for one night, but he never controlled my life,” Merrill said. I did. . . . This trauma did not guide my life. ”
