THowever, I personally believe that all Christmas movies should wait until after Thanksgiving. It just stopped being 80 degrees (26 degrees) in New York City. last week, Hey, you can't blame the movie for being exactly what it sets out to be. The trailer for Hot Frosty, Netflix's latest foray into Hallmark holiday territory, promises to answer the question no one asked: What if Frosty the Snowman had abs? Ta.
In fact, curious people want to know. Thankfully, the actual finished product is 90 minutes of deeply unserious and occasionally sweet fluff, written by Russell Hainline, who, with complete dedication to the genre, “Half-Naked Living.'' Provides logical and spiritual answers to the “Snowman” conundrum. Snowman Jack (Dustin Milligan) wakes up with a barely there strategically placed scarf over his head. The town of Hope Springs is even more of a mirage of New England (by way of Canada) than Stars Hollow from Gilmore Girls. The snow is obviously Styrofoam. All older women have a strong sexual desire. Chrishell Stause also lives there. Merry Christmas!
I have to rate this movie which gets straight to the point. It's ten minutes after we learn that Cassie (Lacey Chabert from Mean Girls) lives in a broken-down house, runs a cafe (sorry, Cassie's Cafe), and is sad and lonely. , she holds a torn human icebox in her hand. As she wore the scarf, he imprinted on her and immediately told her he loved her. He rarely wears a shirt because he gets cold (I wish Mulligan's abs performance would be a little less childish). Cassie's doctor friend (Katie Mixon) concludes that Jack's sub-zero body temperature means he is definitely a snowman, but most of the townspeople quickly accept this fact. That sweet thing must be magical, don't you think? ”
Jack's purpose, for as long as he exists, is to help Cassie heal after losing her beloved husband to cancer, as revealed in Comic Sands by a doctor's note to “start chemotherapy immediately” ( Thank you, director Jerry Cicorritti. And the whole point of “Hot Frosty,'' other than the fact that Jack doesn't know how to kiss or ask Cassie out on a date, is that it's a meringue-light fantasy come true. However, although he is a quick learner, enthusiastic about making dinner and fixing up the house, and gets along with everyone, he still doesn't want to wear a shirt. We don't make real snowmen like this anymore.
The only problem is that Sheriff Nate (Craig Robinson, who clearly has a ball) is a caricature of a cop trying to make a name for himself by arresting a mysterious long-haired “streaker” he sees around town. That's true. Robinson and his lieutenant (Joe Lo Truglio) enliven Hot Frosty with their comically over-the-top good-cop-bad-cop routines and highly arbitrary bail amounts, but they're also full of abs and elf-life hilarity. It's a necessary addition considering there's not much else to Jack other than (he's also). , prefer straight sugar with ice).
But have no fear. Chabert evokes a certain kind of emotion as a woman who has already witnessed one man die and may have to watch another man literally melt to death, but Hot Frosty by far It's a stupid cheer. This movie accomplishes almost everything you'd expect from a movie called Hot Frosty. A reference to Lindsay Lohan's “Mean Girls''/“Falling for Christmas,'' adults in middle school perform a dance just because a woman screams: You can't defibrillate a snowman! ”And the ugliest snowflake necklace I’ve ever seen in my life.
I'm as skeptical as anyone about Netflix's tendency to frame movies as “content” to entice viewers to watch them as cheap and disposable, but here's what I don't like about it: There are almost no This was a really stupid idea, and it was executed in good faith, with everyone involved seemingly completely agreeing, “Yeah, this is a movie about a snowman with abs.” I'll take on that brain freeze for now.
