Dear Abby: My brother-in-law thinks he's fine with his hands. He built a deck behind his house, and it is clear that he is not an expert.
My husband and I have never sat on his deck because we don't look safe. (Other people said the same thing.)
He bragged to me about how he escaped by not having to get a permit and not having the city inspected it during construction. He also hadn't checked it when it was finished.
One day someone will sit on his deck and worry that it will collapse, and people will get hurt.
I think he would know who reported it to him, even if I called the city to report it and the city would show up at his house, send him letters, or make a call and say he would remain anonymous. (The city records all the calls and they also have caller IDs.)
When I tried to talk to him about this, he told me to leave from it because he wasn't in my business. So, do I just leave my mouth closed and hope no one gets hurt? – Midwest relatives
Dear relative: Don't close your mouth! For now, the weather may be too cold for your stepbrother to do fun things on that deck.
But the next time he is hosting friends and family, there may be an accident that could change your life forever.
This should be reported before someone is seriously injured or killed.
Dear Abby: I'm falling for the man in the church. I am a widow and he is a widow. We saw each other for about two months.
We talk on the phone for hours. He is a writer, poet and musician. He reads poetry and biblical poems to me, and sings to me too. We are both happy to laugh.
Unfortunately, I have more money than he does.
He knows I have a nice older car, but he hasn't seen my condo. I'm worried that if he finds out I have a lot of money, he won't like me.
I would like to help him update his apartment as he is very humble and I don't know how to do it.
I want to be honest with him and help him, but I'm worried that it will change things and that money will put a wall between us. Any advice you have is helpful. – Confusing in Florida
Dear Confusion: Keep your mouth closed. Please close your wallet. You've only seen this guy for two months and you may think he's falling for him, but he may not have falling for you yet.
Don't renovate someone's apartment before you're in a committed relationship.
When there is a marriage talk, and when the place of the talk may be in your lawyer or CPA's office, when you discuss which financial assets have. I can't make this too strong and strong.
To my Irish readers: Happy St. Patrick's Day!
“It may be the least you want.
The best time you've ever seen at the worst time you've ever seen. ”
Love, Abby
Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069 at Dearabby.com.
