Couple’s Health Journey: A Shared Fight Against Cancer

A crucial choice made by Etti Zohar, 45, three years ago potentially saved her husband Lior’s life. With two of their three daughters diagnosed with Crohn’s disease, a chronic bowel condition, Etti pushed for both herself and Lior to undergo colonoscopies to determine if there was a genetic link. “I just felt we needed to check our intestines,” she recalled, despite Lior’s reluctance. He thought if everything was normal, there was no need to go to the hospital, but Etti insisted.

Lior recounted the challenges they faced: “She went to our health fund for referrals for both of us, but they wouldn’t approve them since we were under 50. Etti argued with everyone, and when I finally saw the gastroenterologist, she initially questioned my presence. I told her I was afraid, and she later recognized me as ‘the husband of that crazy woman’ who had been there earlier. That got me a referral. I walked into the test feeling quite confident, sure I was okay.”

Etti shared the unexpected news: “After we had our tests, the doctor told us, ‘Etti, you’re fine. Lior, you have a tumor the size of a tennis ball in your bowel.’ We were in disbelief. Lior hadn’t experienced any symptoms. We left the appointment and sat at a café, trying to digest what we had just learned.”

Lior expressed his turmoil: “I felt overwhelmed with thoughts—what would happen to our daughters? Had I done enough with my life? Financial worries loomed large. I became a zombie at work, hiding my distress. I finally decided to forgo reading about the illness and shift my focus to positivity and action.”

While awaiting biopsy results, Etti found a lump in her breast, which led to her own health scare. “I don’t usually check, but something compelled me to feel around. I found a lump that didn’t seem right. Lior urged me to get it checked, but I hesitated, thinking it might just be a cyst. A week later, I noticed a swelling in my armpit and promptly sought a breast surgeon.”

During her examination, Etti sensed something was amiss but received no confirmation from the technicians. Subsequently, she was called back for further testing, where the doctor delivered the shocking news: “You have a cancerous tumor, and it’s aggressive.” Etti found it hard to fathom that both she and Lior were facing severe health challenges at the same time.

Lior felt devastated upon hearing Etti’s diagnosis. He had already braced himself for his own battles but finding out about her condition was unbearable. “We cried together, and in that moment, we resolved to fight this together,” he recalled, highlighting the unlikeliness of their situation—a chatbot had even told him the odds of both spouses being diagnosed with cancer within the same month were one in hundreds of millions.

Etti’s treatment plan included surgery, chemotherapy, and radiation as the tumor was aggressive and required immediate action. When they shared the news with their daughters, they were understandably upset, questioning how their mother could also be diagnosed so soon after their father’s news.

“Is there a history of cancer in your family?” Etti was asked. “Both my mom’s sisters had breast cancer and survived, which is why I stayed on top of my screenings. However, my tumor wasn’t hereditary,” she clarified.

The couple runs a beauty salon alongside their home in Hadera and has three daughters, ages 21, 18, and 13. They first crossed paths during military service and quickly fell for each other. Lior, a fire-control systems technician, recalls how he felt an immediate connection when he saw Etti, a technical operator in the same corps, at the 188th Brigade.

“After dating for just two weeks, I told a friend she was the one I wanted to marry,” Lior said. Their love story continued as they both made their careers in the military, eventually marrying and settling into family life. Despite their diagnosis battles, they opted to keep their struggles private initially, revealing their situation only after each had undergone testing.

In a twist of fate, just after Lior shared the news of their diagnoses with his father, his father suffered a heart attack. Lior, although diagnosed first, found that Etti began chemotherapy before him. “The first treatment was harrowing; I felt like I was choking. Lior was there, supporting me. By the time I completed 12 sessions, I was utterly drained.”

As Etti began treatment, Lior joined a rectal cancer study, learning he would likely bypass surgery but would need chemotherapy and radiation. “Having been with Etti during her treatments, I was prepared but found that the side effects took a toll on me too. Some days, I lost my voice,” he shared.

“Throughout our treatments, we were each other’s anchors. We shared experiences, days where one was battling more than the other, but we always found strength in one another. There was a notable increase in our connection,” Etti reflected on their trials.

Despite the fear of their circumstances, Etti and Lior maintained that their priority was a stable home life for their daughters. “We pushed through, focusing on family and support from our loved ones, including our eldest daughter, who really stepped up during this time,” Etti explained.

“Did you ever consider that one of you might not make it?” Etti was asked. She insisted they hadn’t, believing they would find a way to cope. Lior added, “That thought was terrifying. We talked logistics instead of dwelling on worst-case scenarios.”

As Etti faced a setback during an innovative chemotherapy regimen that somehow worsened her condition, she struggled significantly. “I was too weak to even talk or hold my phone. It was so disorienting, and Lior had to sneak in at night to see me,” she said, recalling a time of great helplessness.

Eventually, after further testing, doctors at Beilinson identified Etti’s Addison’s disease, a condition caused by a medication they prescribed. “I had to undergo surgery to remove the tumor along with lymph nodes before completing my treatments,” Etti explained. Though treatment concluded two years ago, both remain under follow-up care.

In the aftermath, the couple reevaluated their lifestyles. Reflecting on her past experiences, Etti shared that a near-drowning incident had kept her from the water, but treatment ignited a desire to confront that fear. “Lior encouraged me to try stand-up paddleboarding, which was a huge step for me. Now, I go to the sea often; it brings me peace,” she added.

Lior, on the other hand, transformed his habits, eliminating smoking and drastically reducing meat and alcohol intake. “Before, I didn’t think twice about fulfilling my dreams. Now, I realize I have to live my life fully, without waiting for the right moment,” he stated.

They agreed to share their story not for personal reasons but to promote awareness of early detection of cancers. “People need to be vigilant with their health and seek screenings—don’t hesitate,” Etti urged. Lior added the importance of gratitude toward their medical team, acknowledging that Etti’s insistence on a colonoscopy ultimately saved him.

As for the broader implications of their experiences, a leading oncologist explained that approximately 12% of women in Israel will face breast cancer in their lifetimes, with certain alarming symptoms that warrant immediate attention. Early detection can be crucial in improving outcomes.

In the medical community, various risk factors were laid out, including genetic predispositions and lifestyle choices that increase susceptibility to cancer. “With lifestyle changes and awareness, we can drive progress in prevention and treatment of these conditions,” a prominent oncologist concluded.