Dear Abby: Family and Relationships

Since my daughter, Charlie, moved away 12 years ago, we haven’t taken a vacation together. When she came out as a lesbian, I didn’t really accept it at first and, honestly, I didn’t handle it as well as I could have. I did apologize, but things haven’t really improved since then.

Charlie and her partner have made it clear they won’t visit my home unless they can share a bed. They’ve said they wouldn’t dictate my choices in their own space, which I understand. I’ve stayed with them before, and they shared a bed then, but now I can’t stay there anymore because Charlie’s partner has become uncomfortable with it. It’s heartbreaking that I haven’t really been part of their lives in so long. Meanwhile, her partner’s parents visit every year, and they live just a short distance away.

I just don’t understand the situation. Do you have any advice? – No girlfriend in Texas

I’m lonely without her:

I can relate. Perhaps, during your next visit, you could offer to stay in a hotel. If they agree, it might create a more comfortable environment for everyone involved.

Dear Abby: New Relationships

I was married for 19 years, and after the divorce, I didn’t hear from my ex. Honestly, the divorce was the right decision for me. Now, two years later, I’ve met someone new, who I call “Grayson.” We’ve been dating for four months, and it’s going surprisingly well.

Grayson is incredibly kind and loving. He’s the first man who hasn’t ever raised his hand to me, which is really important. We have a lot of fun together, and we almost never argue. We both work and have conversations about marriage. I’ve met his family, and they’ve welcomed me. It seems like fate, but should I really consider saying yes? – I struggle with loving a man

Dear struggle:

It sounds like you have a history of challenging relationships, so just a caution: you might be in that initial, exciting honeymoon phase right now. It feels a bit premature to be discussing marriage.

Whether this connection is fate or just a moment in time, I can’t say for certain. If he’s suggesting marriage, take your time—make sure you’re absolutely certain about him and that he’s as kind and loving as he appears.

Dear Abby: Past Employment Feelings

I had feelings for a colleague, who was also my boss. I thought those feelings might be mutual, but I ended up getting fired due to a disagreement with another colleague.

This was over a month ago, but I still think about him every now and then. I want to reach out, but I’m worried about coming off as awkward or creepy. How can I express my feelings without making things uncomfortable? – Former Connecticut employee

Dear former employee:

If he had shared your feelings, he likely would have reached out already. However, if you still want to connect, you could consider contacting him to ask if he’d be willing to be a reference for you in the future. It opens a door without putting too much pressure on the situation.