Dear Abby: I met a woman from out of state online and we hit it off. We dated for 3 years and got married before she moved here. At the time, she was estranged from her family. She had recently begun to mend her relationship with her daughter, and she was visiting her daughter frequently. There were some rifts in our marriage as her mental state was deteriorating due to her loneliness. She worked from home and I worked overtime to supplement my income.
With my blessing, she moved to her daughter's state to be closer to her grandchildren. I don't want to travel to maintain my marriage. I'm too old for that. She has medical issues so she benefits from my insurance.
We've only been married for a year and a half. I'm worried that if I bring up the divorce because of travel and the fact that we're estranged, she'll claim half of my pension, which I earned from working all my life. What do you advise? — Feeling stuck in Missouri
For those who are feeling stuck: We recommend discussing this issue with a family law attorney licensed to practice in Missouri.I'm not a lawyer (of course), but from where I'm sitting on the West Coast, I look like your wife. deserted Your marriage fell apart in the early stages when she moved away to be closer to her daughter. I wish you good luck. (Please tell me how this will turn out.)
Dear Abby: Somehow, I became the go-to person for the whole family (not only my siblings, but also my parents). I have the means and have been happy to help for decades. I recently lost a brother.And I thought the people I was there would support myself.
Abby, I failed everything. Two didn't show up at all, and two came and went with dizzying speed. It was a two-part ceremony. It was my first gathering. I didn't want to go to the after-party because I was so hurt, but I went because I wanted to honor my brother. Bad decision. My late brother had an enemy who was invited to speak and ruined everything for me.
My husband was very upset and told his family that I had been crying for days. No one was interested enough to contact me to resolve the issue. Instead, they doubled down and called me selfish for needing them to be there for me.
Right now, I am hurt, upset, and have no family to turn to. To be honest, this is nothing new, but I think it hurt a lot because it felt like this was the end of our family event forever. What do you think? — emotional
Dear Full: I sympathize with the loss you have suffered. You have every right to be angry because you saved your family and in return you were treated with disrespect and indifference. I hope that in the future you will start building relationships with people who show some degree of mutual benefit. Since you seem to come from a family of “takers,” expanding your circle increases your chances of forming healthier (and more rewarding) relationships. please Please consider.
Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Dear Abby, contact: http://www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
