Rather than packing their young children for the night and sending them to spend the night at a friend's house, there's a new trend among some parents across the United States.
This is called a “sleeper” or “late over,” where parents pick up their children before bedtime.
To learn more about what's driving this trend, Fox News Digital spoke to two psychologists and one parent about why some parents prefer their kids to sleep in their own beds. I heard the story.
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Erica Komisar, a New York-based psychoanalyst, parenting expert, and author, says, “Sleep deprivation and staying up late can be bad for younger children, for children with separation anxiety, and for sleep and transition issues.'' It's especially effective for sensitive children.”
She said the practice is not necessarily about overprotective parents. It's about being sensitive to the needs of each individual child.
One psychoanalyst said, “Some children can have sleepovers without any hesitation, but others are reluctant to change their habits.'' (St. Petersburg)
“Some kids are comfortable having sleepovers, while others are resistant to changing their habits,” she says.
Nicolette Rienza, MD, LPCC-S, a psychotherapist at LifeStance Health in Beachwood, Ohio, says the trend of pseudo sleepovers involves having children spend the night at someone else's home. He said it was a good compromise for worried parents. Fox News Digital.
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Here are the details:
What is the cause of your parents' anxiety about today's sleepover?
Lianza said there are concerns that children may be put in harm's way when they stay in someone else's home.
“The fear that there might be a gun in the house or that a child might become a victim of sexual abuse can make any parent paranoid and anxious about letting their child spend the night elsewhere.” “It’s enough to be,” she says.
Neha J., who lives in New York and asked that her last name not be used to protect her privacy, has a 9-year-old daughter. She and her spouse have a strict no sleepover policy.
“That's what my husband and I grew up with. We don't feel comfortable with our daughter going to sleepovers,” she said.
“Some children may prefer to sleep in their own bed, so they don't mind being picked up if they don't spend the night,” said one parenting expert. (St. Petersburg)
The mother, who is the inventor of a puzzle game for young people that focuses on improving cognitive and decision-making skills, said the couple usually picks up their daughter around 11 p.m.
“or [we’ll do] “Her host family will allow us to pick her up so she can feel like she's having a slumber party without actually spending the night. ” she added.
What effect does “Sleep Under” have on children?
Lianza says the experience of being picked up late at night can be positive or negative depending on the individual child.
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“Some children may prefer to sleep in their own bed, so they don't mind being picked up if they don't spend the night,” she says.
“But some people may feel ashamed that they are not allowed to spend the night or that they are different.”
“It's not a matter of trust in her, but rather a decision we made based on our comfort level.”
Neha J said she sometimes faced pushback from her daughter.
“As she grows up, this arrangement sometimes disappoints her,” she said. “We understand that our daughter wants to be with her friends, but as parents we feel it would be better for her to stay with us overnight, especially if we don't know the other family well. I explain that I feel safe.”
He added: “We would like to emphasize that this is not a matter of trust in her, but a decision we made based on our comfort level.”
Parents who don't feel comfortable having sleepovers may start by sending their children to the home of someone they know and trust, one expert said. (St. Petersburg)
The mother said the main reason she picked up her daughter before bed was to reassure her that she was safe.
“We believe that children are most vulnerable when they are asleep. By taking them home, we eliminate even the slightest possibility of harm or discomfort that may occur in an unfamiliar environment.” I do,” she said.
“My advice is for parents to be cautious but not overprotective.”
Experts say the practice of “sleep under” could be a trial run for a real sleepover.
LifeStance Health's Leenza said parents may start by having their children stay with someone they know and trust.
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“It could be at the home of an immediate family member or another loved one. This can be a kind of test run for both the child and the parents.”
If a child wants to stay with a friend or classmate that the family doesn't know much about, parents should discuss potential safety issues with the other parent, such as whether the child owns a gun. is important. Go home, Leenza advises.
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“My advice is that parents should be careful, but not overprotective,” she said.
“We all want to protect our children, but we also don't want to suffocate them. It's all about balance.”
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