A Quiet Coastal Revolution
“Why only two?”
This question, raised six years ago by J.T. Scott, a city council member in Somerville, Massachusetts, captures a crucial point in the discussion about government acknowledgment of polyamory.
At the time, Scott and a fellow council member were exploring a domestic partnership ordinance. Initially, the draft defined a domestic partnership as being “between two people,” as reported by The Harvard Crimson.
However, Councilor Lance L. Davis felt something was off. He then posed the question: “Why only two?”
Davis made a few adjustments to the ordinance, allowing groups of more than two adults to register as domestic partners. The city council passed the revised ordinance with a unanimous 11-0 vote.
It was signed into law by then-Mayor Joe Curtatone on June 29, 2020, marking the first “multiple-partner domestic partnership ordinance” in the United States, according to the Harvard Law Review.
Shortly after, Cambridge, Somerville’s neighboring city, updated its own domestic partnership law to include multiple persons in 2021.
The Polyamory Legal Advocacy Coalition (PLAC) provided detailed recommendations to the Cambridge City Council regarding the new ordinance, which was described as the initial step in what advocates hoped would be a broader recognition of polyamorous families and relationships. Their efforts bore fruit when Arlington, Massachusetts, recognized multi-partner domestic partnerships in April 2021.
Following this, cities began crafting anti-discrimination ordinances.
In 2023, Somerville enacted a non-discrimination ordinance that forbids discrimination based on “family or relationship structure” in employment and policy. This ordinance was developed with input from PLAC, as reported by The Somerville Times. PLAC is also backed by organizations such as the American Psychological Association Division 44 Committee on Consensual Non-Monogamy, the Chosen Family Law Center, and the Harvard Law School LGBTQ+ Advocacy Clinic.
Cambridge later followed Somerville’s example with its own non-discrimination measure in 2023.
On the West Coast, activists took note. Cities like Oakland and Berkeley in California implemented similar measures, with Olympia, Washington, joining in as well. Additionally, the Portland City Council in Oregon moved forward with an anti-discrimination ordinance in late February, as noted by Fox 12.
Legislation aiming at similar outcomes is currently under consideration in Seattle, Astoria, and West Hollywood.
The Polyamory Movement’s Legal Strategy
Roger Severino, the vice president of economic and domestic policy at The Heritage Foundation, spoke to the Daily Caller about the strategies used by polyamory advocates, suggesting they mirror tactics from the same-sex marriage campaign.
“If marriage is focused solely on the fulfillment of adult desires, then there’s no basis for limiting it to two people. Why not expand to three? Four?” he questioned.
Severino articulated that the legal push is to establish polyamory as a protected class locally, and then potentially on a state and national level.
He suggested it’s important to reintroduce the “Defense of Monogamous Marriage Act,” arguing for a federal definition of marriage as a union between two committed individuals to prevent polyamory from gaining wider acceptance.
“Not all relationship structures yield equal outcomes, and it’s vital for governments to acknowledge this reality, especially for the well-being of children,” he emphasized.
Law And Sex And Culture
The law shapes societal behaviors and can be seen as reflecting the desires of certain groups. Legal protections for polyamory appear to represent a minority viewpoint, significantly motivated by specific individuals and interests. Media outlets, including The New York Times, have shown a tendency to promote pro-polyamory narratives.
Jennifer Wilson, in an article for The New Yorker, explored how polyamory has gained traction, observing that the institution of marriage seems to be evolving.
Yet personally, I don’t know many couples openly embracing non-monogamy. It feels as though there’s a push from some groups to present polyamory as something more mainstream than it actually is. In a Pew Research Center poll from 2023, over half of adults aged 18-29 deemed an “open marriage” acceptable, though this stated preference may not match reality.
Interestingly, college-educated women tend to marry at higher rates than their counterparts without degrees, which may suggest that non-monogamous arrangements are still quite rare.
This brings me back to Scott’s question: “Why only two?”
Without prioritizing children’s welfare as a reason to define marriage traditionally, one might want to reflect on the long-term implications for society.
J.D. Unwin, an ethnologist, once argued that societies flourish when they maintain strict sexual norms—highlighting that cultural achievements often stem from traditions of monogamy.
He noted that history doesn’t support the idea of a civilization thriving without monogamous practices.
Unwin concluded that true civilization requires a certain structure; if that structure diminishes, decline is inevitable.
It’s possible we’re already experiencing that decline.
