Slate has an advice column called Good Job that focuses on workplace issues. If you have a problem, whether it’s significant or slight, you can send it in anonymously for feedback.
Dear Good Job,
The situation with my boss is a bit challenging. He’s a notorious hypochondriac, constantly fixated on his various aches and pains. Now that we’re back in the office after COVID, he wears an N95 mask all day. He often mentions his symptoms and has even asked me to examine some moles on him—thankfully, in less sensitive areas—to see if I think he should have them checked out.
Every single day, he has me searching online for information about the latest health issues he believes he’s experiencing, which is distracting me from my actual work. It’s not just me—he assigns similar “research tasks” to others, and we’re all pretty fed up. Our human resources department isn’t particularly helpful, so I’m wondering if you might have any suggestions.
—Involuntary Infectious Disease Researcher
Dear Involuntary Infectious Disease Researcher,
Your boss seems to have a real issue, though it likely doesn’t involve moles. I can’t make a diagnosis, but he might be dealing with hypochondria, which is a variant of health anxiety. This condition can be quite disruptive and is treatable. Psychiatry has identified two primary syndromes: illness anxiety disorder, which is a fear of developing a health issue, and somatic symptom disorder, where a person is preoccupied with physical symptoms. We’ve seen an increase in health anxiety since the COVID pandemic. However, his constant masking isn’t necessarily indicative of hypochondria; it’s worth noting that serious respiratory illnesses are still present. The internet has also spawned something called “cyberchondria,” where people compulsively search for medical information. While it’s not your responsibility to treat your boss, perhaps you or a colleague might gently suggest that his worries about health issues are increasingly recognized as treatable problems. This might encourage him to seek help.
If no one on the team feels ready to have that discussion, you could always tell him you’re too occupied with your own work to assist in these searches. You might point out that it doesn’t make sense for you to look up information about conditions you aren’t experiencing. Another tactic would be to emphasize privacy—suggest that the concerns he has may require a level of confidentiality that is inappropriate for you to delve into. Alternatively, you could express that you don’t feel qualified to assess health concerns and remind him that medical professionals can provide the necessary guidance.
Send Your Questions to Good Job!
Laura Helmuth and Doree Shafrir are here to help you with workplace dynamics. Have a colleague who won’t stop messaging you after hours? Or perhaps a work romance has taken a wrong turn? Ask your question!
Dear Good Job,
My company is shutting down at the end of the year, and while I’m supposed to receive a severance package, I’ve caught the attention of a few potential employers. I don’t want to abandon my already understaffed store, but I’m also wary of the uncertain job market. I have some interest in one employer in particular, but my current employer knows them too, and I fear he might fire me if he suspects I’m looking around—he tends to make rash decisions. How do I navigate this situation?
—Should I Stay, or Should I Go Now?
Dear Should I Stay, or Should I Go Now,
Your current employer has been upfront about the company folding, which is a responsible move, and they’re right to offer severance to those willing to stick it out until the end. Do you know how substantial that severance will be? If it’s a few months’ pay or more, retaining your position might make sense, as you can search thoroughly during that time. However, if the severance details are vague or if there’s uncertainty about its availability, you should feel free to leave for your own reasons; companies frequently let people go for various motives.
I believe you need more clarity, and it might be wise to have straightforward discussions with both your current and potential employers. Start by talking to the latter. You can express your loyalty to your team while also conveying an interest in their organization. It could serve your case well to highlight your commitment to your current job, showing your value as a candidate. Make sure to ask for confidentiality regarding your conversation, as you’re not actively job hunting yet. A prospective employer should respect this, but it’s always good to verify that they will keep it to themselves.
How they respond will give you insight into whether you want to work with them. Do they respect your privacy? Are they transparent about their hiring timeline? If they make an offer requiring immediate availability, you can leverage this uncertainty in negotiations. You might mention that leaving your current job would mean forfeiting severance—but if their offer could be more appealing, that might ease your decision.
Should you choose to remain at your job, use this situation to inquire further about potential opportunities and the severance package—try to get it documented. Given that the company is understaffed, you might find new responsibilities that could enrich your experience—and possibly even lead to a title that enhances your job prospects afterward. Let your employer know that you want to contribute meaningfully during your remaining time.
Dear Good Job,
I’ve finally managed to leave a toxic workplace that really affected my well-being. I got a new job and am two weeks in. It’s aligned with what I want to do, and I’m feeling less stressed and more secure.
But there’s a catch—I’m feeling like I’ve become somewhat of a caretaker for the older patients receiving medical attention, which isn’t what I signed up for. They have aides, but they’re not always around; they should be, especially considering the fall risks.
Then came the worst part: a resident fell while I was leading a program. I was devastated. They couldn’t articulate what happened, and the language barrier made it even harder. I spent my day off replaying the incident in my mind, questioning whether I should even be in this job. I reached out to my supervisor about the situation but haven’t heard back. What should I do? I know I could look for another job, but it took me a year to secure this one.
—What to Do?
Dear What to Do,
Congratulations on getting away from a bad situation and starting fresh! Transitioning to a new role can be a tough adjustment, and it’s normal to have concerns at the beginning. Allow yourself time to adjust and accept that you’re doing your best in an imperfect workplace. Be patient with yourself and your team as you navigate this new environment while recovering from your previous job’s stresses.
As a new employee, you likely have several questions. It’s wise to ask for a check-in after your first few weeks for clarity on your role. Avoid bringing up your supervisor’s lack of feedback; they could simply be overwhelmed with messages. Instead, focus on ensuring you grasp your responsibilities, especially regarding resident safety. Avoid calling your role a “babysitter,” which sounds dismissive. Define how to address situations when aides aren’t around. If this isn’t in your job description, keep in mind that those documents can be vague, so understanding what’s truly expected is essential.
If you see that residents aren’t receiving appropriate care, the issue could stem from poor systems or a lack of understanding about protocols. Your perspective as a newcomer might reveal things long-time employees have overlooked.
—Laura
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