Dear Abby:

When my daughter, “Trish,” separated from her husband, I reached out to both of them occasionally. Trish ended the relationship after admitting to an affair through an email. Her husband forwarded me this email. She had always kept boundaries with friends in the past, which makes this situation feel particularly troubling. My husband accepted his share of the blame in their past issues, and we’ve managed to move on. It seems, though, that Trish hasn’t.

At present, Trish and her husband have come to a temporary agreement, but she intends to leave again and file for divorce. I offered to accompany her to a counseling session, but I’m unsure if she realizes I’m aware of her comments about me. Her husband did apologize for sharing the email without her consent, but that can’t be undone now.

During our conversations, my daughter seems genuinely guarded—especially since she lives so far away. Should I tell her I know what she disclosed about me? Maybe it could serve as a pathway to addressing the issues between us? Although I want to continue reaching out to her with love and understanding, I’m left wondering whether she still harbors this resentment. – The Incomplete Mom in Florida

Dear Mom: In the turmoil of her marriage, your daughter may feel inclined to blame you for her affair based on what she perceives as your example during her upbringing. Her husband might have shared her email with the intention of damaging your relationship. While other issues between you might exist, I don’t see any benefit in revealing that you know her comments at this juncture. It may be best to wait.

Dear Abby:

My 15-year-old grandson races BMX bikes. Last year, he suffered a traumatic brain injury that required care at a children’s hospital. After he healed, he eagerly returned to racing. Unfortunately, he recently crashed and injured his kidneys. As I write this, he’s in intensive care, and I’m unsure how long he’ll stay or if dialysis will be necessary afterwards.

His parents intend to bring him back to the BMX track as soon as he recovers. I find that very irresponsible. It’s been noted that teenagers, like him, often struggle to gauge risks effectively. What can I do to prevent this? – Southern Grandma

Dear Concerned: There’s a saying about getting back on the horse after a fall, yet common sense suggests avoiding such dangerous situations after life-threatening incidents. It’s alarming that your grandson is considering returning to racing now. Allowing him to do so seems unwise on his parents’ part. However, there’s likely little you can do to stop him from making risky choices, so perhaps start praying.