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My husband has ignored me ever since I got pregnant

Dear Abby: When I met my husband, I felt valued. But ever since I got pregnant, he stopped considering my feelings and treating me as a priority. I have to beg him for support, but when his mother and sister need help, he immediately helps them.

I married him because he seemed loyal and devoted to his family, and I thought he would be the same for us. But during the last months of my pregnancy, I felt ignored. He’s not too excited about the baby and we didn’t bond while I was pregnant.

I feel like I’m the last item on his list. I’m slowly moving away from him. Even if things changed after the baby was born, I don’t think I would respect or have any romantic feelings for the baby anymore. I now see him in a different light and find him less attractive. Help me. — At a Crossroads in Maine

Dear Crossroads: Before you go any further, realize that you are heading towards a fork in the road. The path you should take is the one that leads to the OB/GYN office. You may be experiencing symptoms of antenatal depression, so you need to tell your doctor what’s going on in your head and in your marriage. Don’t put this off. Your baby needs a father, but the further you get from your husband, the less likely he is to have one.

Dear Abby: My income is limited. My sister “Tara” is a medical professional and spends her disposable income on crappy things. I have one of hers, her 13 year old son. She has three children, she is 14 years old, 10 years old and 3 years old. Tara and I live a few miles apart. Our mother lives 60 miles away. My mother takes care of her sister’s children every other week. She hardly takes care of my son. I have to take her son to her. She drives to Tara’s house to pick up her children and takes them back to her house.

I “borrowed” a considerable amount of money from my mother. She regularly asks me about her repayments.

She spends a lot of extra money on Tara’s children’s meals because they have special dietary needs. Between then and driving there and back, my mom spent almost twice as much money on her sister’s meals as I did in the same amount of time.

This is very one sided and I feel like for some reason my mom cares more about Tara than me. I also feel like her son is being ignored by her mother. Am I wrong to feel this way? Should I say something or should I leave it alone? — Georgia bias

Dear biased person: You seem to be jealous of your sister for various reasons. Your mother, like your sister, has the right to spend her time and money doing whatever she wants. I don’t understand why your mother prefers Tara’s children. Maybe it’s time for her to ask her why.

As for her request to repay the money she lent you, it’s best to work out a repayment plan from the beginning. now Hope it will improve your relationship with her. But if that doesn’t happen, arrange for someone else to watch your son.

Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Dear Abby, contact: http://www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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