Thammika Songkaeo felt an instant connection with her husband when they first met back in 2011.
They quickly bonded and tied the knot two years later, starting a family with the birth of their daughter. However, beneath this deep emotional bond, Songkaeo was constantly troubled by one issue: her husband’s lack of interest in sex.
During their early days, her husband revealed to her that he suffered from low libido and erectile dysfunction, issues he attributed to finasteride, a common medication used by many men to combat hair loss.
At first, she thought his problems were just a phase. When intimacy became a challenge, she encouraged him to try Viagra. Concerned about being called a ‘sex addict,’ she refrained from discussing their situation with friends, which, unfortunately, led her to feel increasingly isolated, descending into depression and even suicidal thoughts.
After seven years, feeling overwhelmed, she made the decision to file for divorce.
Finasteride, available through telehealth services, can range from $30 for a month’s supply and is typically prescribed as a hair loss preventative.
Thammika Songkaeo has revealed how finasteride destroyed her marriage, saying it left her ex-husband with low libido and erectile dysfunction
The drug was originally meant for men with enlarged prostates but is now widely used for hair loss treatment.
Currently, about 2.6 million men in the United States take finasteride.
This medication blocks the conversion of testosterone into dihydrotestosterone (DHT), a hormone believed to cause hair follicles to shrink.
However, DHT also plays a key role in sexual arousal, erectile function, and the health of genital tissue. Reducing it can lead to complications.
While finasteride is effective at promoting hair growth, many men experience significant drawbacks, with some claiming it has devastated their sexual relationships, and even their psychological well-being, sometimes long after stopping the medication.
Songkaeo’s husband was prescribed finasteride by a health clinic prior to their meeting. Doctors believe he was dealing with post-finasteride syndrome, characterized by ongoing sexual, neurological, physical, and mental side effects after using the medication.
Inspired by her experiences, Songkaeo wrote a book about a woman trapped in a marriage with an asexual partner, named Stamford Hospital, which launched in the U.S. on April 15 of this year.
In an interview with DailyMail.com, she shared that her husband disclosed the side effects of finasteride after they began dating.
“We noticed that something felt off regarding physical intimacy,” she mentioned. “There just wasn’t the level of connection I expected based on past relationships.”
She revealed the damage it had caused on the YouTube channel Moral Medicine, where patients who say they were harmed by finasteride publish their stories
She reflected, thinking it would be resolvable, not realizing it could be a lasting issue. “Maybe it will be alright,” she thought. But it ultimately wasn’t.
The couple began their relationship on the East Coast but moved to Singapore together. Songkaeo recounted in an interview with Moral Medicine, which highlights finasteride’s negative impacts, that they did attempt to use Viagra to improve intimacy.
Yet, after the arrival of their daughter, she sensed that even the little intimacy they had was fading, making her feel increasingly disconnected in the relationship.
At that time, she said, “I felt incredibly lonely. I never knew such a deep loneliness was possible. It was intense and distressing.”
Eventually, this feeling became unbearable, leading to their decision to part ways amicably.
Despite facing resistance from her family back in Thailand about her choice to leave the marriage, Songkaeo and her ex-husband have since maintained a strong friendship and successfully co-parent their daughter.
However, she is certain she wouldn’t return to that romantic relationship.
Finasteride operates by inhibiting the enzyme converting testosterone into DHT, which is typically found in the genital area, as noted by the Cleveland Clinic.
While about 2 to 3 percent of users experience side effects, the most common are erectile difficulties, decreased sexual desire, and ejaculation issues, like little to no semen.
Doctors usually inform patients that these side effects will diminish once they stop taking the drug.
Offering advice to other women dealing with similar situations, she suggested, “Leading conversations with compassion can yield the best outcomes. A dialogue rooted in love and understanding is vital.”
“Those suffering from post-finasteride syndrome shouldn’t be seen in any negative light. They’re victims of a potentially dangerous medication.”
At the same time, she believes partners shouldn’t have to face these issues as if they are unimportant.
She concluded, “If both sides approach discussions with love, respect, and empathy, even the way a relationship ends can turn into a positive part of the journey.”
