Dear Abby: I suffered an injury and suffered internal bleeding, resulting in iron deficiency anemia. Before my diagnosis, I struggled with symptoms of depression and anxiety. I had never had a mental health problem in my life, so I had no idea what was happening to me. I was happy and calm all my life until this medical condition changed my behavior drastically.
My wife of 20 years left me. After she left, I was diagnosed with iron deficiency anemia. After diagnosis, my blood loss stopped and my anemia was cured. The symptoms subsided and I returned to my normal state.
I was sure my wife and I would reconcile once I got the diagnosis, but she told me I was using my illness as an excuse for my behavior. She doesn’t understand that it’s the cause. She mistakenly thinks I have a permanent mental illness. She does not understand that these symptoms will disappear once the disease is cured. She said it brought out my true personality, but that’s not true.
My wife and family are everything in my life. I did not develop this condition on purpose. We have a 4 year old daughter and he is a great father to me. My wife has abandoned her family and is trying to take her daughter away from me. Because even though I had a disease that could be cured, I am no longer sick. How can I make her understand what happened and save her family? — the saddest man in the world
Dear Saddest Man: Although you cannot force your wife to reconcile, it would be beneficial for both of you to consult a doctor to explain the reason for your personality change and to assure her that the problem is not permanent. Beneficial.
If that doesn’t help, you have to accept that the marriage ended for the most tragic reason and move on with your life. We sincerely apologize for your predicament.
Dear Abby: My husband passed away two years ago. It has been a lot of hard work, but we are succeeding. I have two sons. One person is himself. The other is a junior high school student. I want to move back to my hometown, but my son wants to stay here with his friends and attend the local high school like his older brother. There’s nothing that binds me here other than work.
I’m very sad and depressed. Moving back home where friends and family are nearby is good for me, but may not be for him. Losing his father was really difficult for him. It will take four years for him to finish school. I just want to be a good mother. Please give me advice. — Not sure in South Carolina
I’m not sure: Don’t let your son move during his last year or two of middle school. By then, cliques have formed and he may not fit in at his new school.
The best time to do this would be the summer before your son’s freshman year of high school. Because at that time, all students will be in a new environment and on a more equal footing socially. It’s also a good idea to discuss this with your son’s school counselor and ask for suggestions.
Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440 (Los Angeles, CA 90069).
