Portland Sea Dogs dropped the hardest hat ever but we still have questions

Minor league baseball caps are the best.

There’s no doubt about it: MiLB has produced a lot of great hats over the years, like this one. Rocket City Trash Pandaor this hat Montgomery Biscuits.

But the Portland Sea Dogs have taken it to the next level.

Portland is Boston Red Sox, Change your brand name There will be just one game this season, the “Maine Lobster Bake,” taking place on Aug. 23.

And the hats they wear in that game are really sturdy.

Honestly, there’s no excuse for this hat to try so hard. Look at the lobster on the hat, it’s giving a menacing look that tells anyone who comes near it that the fight of their life is about to begin. What does this hat have in it? We don’t know (more on that later), but this lobster looks like it’s going to maul us to death.

“Lobster is arguably Maine’s most iconic food. When you think of lobster, you think of Maine. We wanted to create a theme night that would pay tribute to Maine’s most famous delicacy and the Mainers who have dedicated their lives to this industry that is so vital to our economy.” “We’re thrilled to be working with Portland to bring this new facility to the market,” said Jeff LaCuessa, Portland’s general manager and president..

Still, questions remain.

Poor Lobster
Jared Mueller

We initially sent this hat to a loving Slack channel expressing our concern for the poor little lobster. The message was literally “poor little lobster in the frying pan.” Mark exclaimed how awesome the hat was, but his little face told us he was about to be cooked.

No matter how cool the actual hat is, would anyone really want to put a mascot in a frying pan with other ingredients for a meal? Ohio State University As a Buckeye fan, I would put the Wolverines in the frying pan because I intend to cook and eat my rival.

And is that an axe, a homeless stick, or a toothpick with a prong on it to pick up cooked food?

Nice hat, poor lobster!

I have so many questions about this chef
James Deiter

This is a good hat. It’s a little lobster ready to fight anyone trying to steam it to perfection. Scary. Adorable. I can see the appeal.

What I do take issue with is the people trying to cook this lobster. They are clearly putting all of the ingredients in a sauté pan, or as we call it in the US, a high-walled skillet that browns food over direct heat and then finishes it over a long period using the indirect heat of the oven, a multi-functional unit designed for braising or roasting food.

The pan won’t reach the lobster’s claws. What are you trying to do? There is absolutely no way you can properly cook a lobster like this. Even if you add liquid, the heat will be extremely uneven and you won’t be able to boil or effectively steam the lobster.

This is a copper-core skillet, so the chef is clearly investing in quality cookware, and this appears to be an All-Clad Copper-Core Triple-Ply 7-Quart Fry Pan. Retail price is $250You know what’s even cheaper? A stockpot! If you splurge, you can buy things you don’t need at all.essary All-Clad Stockpot and Yet it’s priced at just $129.

The complete disrespect for high-quality ingredients, inhumanely sautéing a Maine lobster and unevenly frying the body parts, fills me with irrational anger. Either boil a load of water and throw the lobster in, or learn how to quickly handle it with a knife.

This chef is a monster.

This is the first time I’ve ever bought a hat so quickly.
Mark Schofield

Honestly, that says it all.

Thanks to the wonders of the internet, your very own Lobster Bake hat is just a few clicks away.

Indeed, maybe this hat was designed for me after all: I’m a Red Sox fan, grew up in New England, vacationed to Maine many summers, and attended many lobster boils.

However, this is a lobster that is being swung around violently and falls over.

What is it holding in its claws? We don’t know. Is it a pickaxe? Is it a stick with belongings tied to the end? What belongings does the lobster actually have? Is there something about this lobster’s past that it doesn’t want us to know? The stick raised many questions. SB Nation A Slack channel.

But there’s no question about how sturdy this hat is.

And I bought a hat faster than I ever have before.