Dining Etiquette: A Server’s Perspective

It seems that a bit more general courtesy could go a long way.

When dining out, there are certain behaviors customers should keep in mind. Recently, a server named Kiley shared her frustrations on TikTok, highlighting what she calls “icks” from her interactions with customers.

“These are the pet peeves I encounter as a server. I’m going to share three,” Kiley began her video, which has amassed over 100,000 views and garnered plenty of comments.

“First off, when I approach the table and say, ‘Hello, my name is…’—before I can even finish, someone immediately demands a ‘diet cola.’ Can you give me like, ten seconds? …And guess what, now you’re definitely getting regular cola,” she explained.

“I really dislike that. Patience, folks! I’ll take your drink order—just remember to acknowledge me first,” she added.

The second pet peeve involves those elusive free refills. It’s something many servers deal with regularly. “When someone asks if they’ll receive a free refill of strawberry lemonade, I cringe. I’m already juggling a ton of orders,” she said.

Kiley admitted that when customers pose this question, she often tells them the restaurant is out of strawberry lemonade—whether it’s true or not.

Her third pet peeve comes from awkward encounters at tables. “I’m just trying to do my job, and here comes a jealous girlfriend, convinced I’m out to steal her man,” she remarked.

“I try really hard to make her feel at ease. I compliment her, give her my full attention. I even ignore her boyfriend, yet she still gives me that attitude. Honestly, I can’t even when the tips are usually low,” she said.

Kiley’s online revelations come on the heels of another restaurant worker’s experience, who faced backlash after confronting customers about their lack of tipping.

This worker said, “I asked, ‘Is my service bad or something?’ They replied, ‘No,’ so I pressed, ‘Well, you didn’t leave any tips for me.’ And the customer insisted, ‘I left you seven dollars’.” But the worker disputed that claim.

“The outright lies really made me upset,” she continued. “I said, ‘No, you didn’t,’ and they insisted, ‘Yes, I did.’ Eventually, the diner ran off to complain to the manager, and before long, the server was let go.”