Increase in Prenups Among Young Americans
As young Americans, especially those under 45, navigate relationships, there’s a growing trend of opting for prenuptial agreements. This shift, highlighted in a recent Bloomberg article, reflects changing attitudes, with more women seeking these financial protections. Some law firms are even reporting a notable increase in requests, processing close to 100 such contracts annually.
On another note, divorce continues to carry a stigma, often seen as a painful end to a marriage. However, one therapist is aiming to shift that perspective. Saleen Arias, the author of “Discovering Diamonds: A Story of Compassionate Divorce,” advocates for what she calls “compassionate divorce.” According to her, ending a marriage doesn’t have to equate to failure but can herald the start of a new chapter.
Arias often counsels couples in turbulence during her “Diamond Workshop,” helping them to redefine their understanding of success. “I strive to normalize the concept of ‘compassionate divorce,'” she shared. This approach contrasts starkly with how divorce is often depicted in media, where couples typically take on adversarial roles in lengthy, costly legal battles.
Although Arias promotes a different perspective, statistics reveal that Americans are divorcing less often. Recently, the Pew Research Center highlighted a drop in the divorce rate from 20.5 per 1,000 married women in 2008 to 14.4 in 2023, which some attributes to evolving marriage trends.
Arias explains the inspiration behind referring to her work as “diamonds.” After announcing her divorce to her children, her son, just seven at the time, noted that the family shape shifted from a square to a diamond. This metaphor resonates with Arias, who believes that while couples may drift apart, they can still maintain family unity.
In her workshops, Arias defines success not merely by couples staying together but by fostering healthier family dynamics. “In the Diamond Workshop, I gauge success through balance—half of the couples rediscovering their spark together, and the other half choosing to part ways with compassion,” she explained.
Furthermore, she emphasizes that many couples often confound a broken marriage with turmoil within their family. She insists that children can be significantly affected by the negativity surrounding contentious divorces rather than the divorce itself. “Toxic environments are detrimental to children,” she states. Yet, she’s noted that kids from compassionate divorces often seek clarity about the changes in their family structure.
Arias’s own divorce informed her views. Now, more than ten years later, she describes her relationship with her ex-husband as a healthy part of her support system. “We are much happier now than we were,” she said, highlighting that life is not as binary as society often presents it—marriage as a fairy tale versus divorce as a failure. “That’s just not true. It’s more nuanced than that,” she concluded.
