My Experience with Health and Aging Tests
When I signed up for the health and aging tests, I was prepared for some bloodletting. What I didn’t quite anticipate was the sheer volume I’d need to provide.
Having undergone various fertility treatments over the years, I’m well-acquainted with blood draws. Usually, it’s a couple of vials at a time, maybe a dozen tops. Plus, many longevity tests ask for an overnight fast, which can be a bit annoying.
Thankfully, it wasn’t intravenous. Through these tests, I gained insights into my hormone levels, nutrients, liver function, and got tips on improving my diet and aging gracefully as a 43-year-old mom.
There’s a plethora of test kits available, but I soon discovered they’re not all the same.
Some are designed to push supplements, leading you to retake them frequently at steep prices, sometimes hundreds of dollars. The best tests clearly explain how they derive results and offer meaningful recommendations—rather than vague instructions like “eat better” or “exercise more.”
Now, let’s go over the six tests I tried. They ranged from measuring microplastic exposure to assessing the risk of inflammatory bowel disease and vitamin D levels. I did wish someone would have evaluated the nagging pain in my arm after all that blood was drawn.
Blueprint Microplastics Test
Cost: $135
This test, created by biohacker Brian Johnson and his Blueprint team, aims to identify harmful plastic particles in the blood. Research suggests these pesky fragments might contribute to cardiovascular issues, infertility, and certain cancers.
For this test, I needed to prick my finger and smear blood onto a card, which I then mailed to a lab.
It felt like more than just a test—it tested my ten years of marriage! Instead of standard diabetic lancets, they provided a hefty metal needle to minimize plastic exposure. I struggled so much that my husband eventually offered to help. He jokingly asked if I was a vampire because nothing was happening!
In the end, the results weren’t super enlightening. They stated I was “within range” for both small and large microplastics but didn’t clarify what that meant. I was left pondering my biggest source of exposure. Maybe I should just toss out all the plastic in my house?
Function Health Test
Cost: Memberships start at $365 per year, including over 160 lab tests.
This test required an 8-hour fast and two visits to a nearby testing site within my menstrual cycle timeframe. The first blood draw was overwhelming—my arm definitely wasn’t equipped for 12 vials! However, I adjusted the schedule and ended up taking 12 vials on one day and then came back for 8 more. Oh, and I had to pee in a cup too.
Results covered 117 biomarkers, including antibodies, electrolytes, and biological age, which clocked in at a youthful 29.3!
The clinician’s notes really explored 15 major biomarker categories, advising me to balance cholesterol, up my omega-3 intake, and address my hormones. That’s a lot to digest!
Optimal Health Biomarker Test
Cost: Starts at $65 for men or women, with memberships beginning at $25/month.
This standard test evaluates more than 40 biomarkers, with blood drawn at a local lab.
The phlebotomist came to my home, which I found very convenient. However, there was a catch. Horn (the representative) suggested I fast overnight and then take up to 19 vials. I wavered, but we settled on 15.
I completed a detailed lifestyle questionnaire and had a solid hour-long video consultation with two doctors. Their advice was incredibly thorough, covering everything from stopping certain medications to monitoring symptoms.
Molecular You Test
Cost: $1,099.99
This test claimed to only require two vials for a health assessment. A phlebotomist came to my house to collect my blood.
I received a health score indicating my risk for various diseases—everything from inflammatory bowel disease to Alzheimer’s and depression. The 45-minute consultation proved very insightful. The scientist highlighted high proline levels, an amino acid linked to metabolic stress.
He recommended a low-carb diet, omega-3s, green tea, Brazil nuts, plenty of water, and suggested a retest in six months.
Tally Health Test
Cost: $249
This was a cheek swab, which was a relief! After I collected some cells and mailed them, Tally Health analyzed over 200,000 DNA methylation sites to estimate my TallyAge, reflecting my biological aging. It came back as 36.9 years, about 5.7 years younger than my actual age!
They also included a lifestyle survey covering mental health, diet, exercise, and sleep.
The goal is to improve these habits and check in twice a year to see if my TallyAge improves.
Ultra Human Ring Test
Cost: Retail price is $349; blood vision plan starts at $99 semi-annually or $365 annually.
I’ve been using the Ultra Human Ring AIR for a few months now, finding the sleep and heart rate features quite valuable. However, the blood vision test required a lab visit and 15 vials of blood.
Results were sent to the app, indicating my blood age was 41 based on 106 biomarkers including vitamin D and omega fatty acids.
The app’s AI combined this data with my sleep, exercise, and heart rate info to recommend I eat more fatty fish, take omega-3 and zinc supplements, reduce stress, and of course, exercise more.
