Dear Abby: I’m a senior man who’s been married and divorced twice. For the last eight years, I’ve been in a relationship with a wonderful woman. While she has always had some control issues, I managed to overlook them because of the love we share.
Lately, I’ve faced health challenges with a heart condition, which has limited my ability to work part-time and reduced my income. This change has affected the way I can support her lifestyle. She recently retired and wants to travel more, but I can’t provide that right now. This situation has created some tension.
Two years ago, I proposed to her, but she hesitated and said she didn’t want to marry or cohabit; she preferred things as they are. Recently, though, she mentioned that she doesn’t love me the way she used to.
It’s hard for me to think negatively about her, but I suspect my health and financial struggles might be why things have shifted. This hurts, especially since I still love her, and moving on feels impossible. I consider myself a hopeless romantic and a gentleman. I’m unsure about starting over at 70, but I don’t want to face loneliness either. What do you recommend? — Disillusioned in New Jersey
Response: It’s tough to hear you’re feeling down. Based on what you’ve shared, it seems your partner enjoyed the benefits of financial support, and now that things have changed, her true feelings are surfacing. It may be hard to accept, but this could be a blessing in disguise.
Remember, you don’t have to go through this alone. You deserve a relationship that involves mutual effort, including financial aspects. There are independent women out there who might be a better match for you.
Dear Abby: My wealthy neighbor and I share a wall, and her poor irrigation habits have already caused damage. I’m not concerned about the cosmetic issues, as I’m the only one who sees them.
The inspector recommended some work to properly waterproof the wall and install drainage. I wanted to get a contractor’s quote, but my neighbor refuses to allow that due to her plants.
Recently, she sent me certified mail stating she no longer wants to communicate. The city claims it’s not involved in disputes between neighbors. I’m at a bit of a loss. Any suggestions? — Hogtied in California
Response: Water erosion is a serious concern, and it’s likely your property will eventually be affected by your neighbor’s drainage issues. Her decision to send certified mail might have been guided by her attorney, which suggests you should consider hiring your own legal help. With her meticulous nature, protecting your property is essential.
