GREG GUTFELD: Florida’s the Sunshine State, not the Pitch-Black Dark State

Last weekend, NBC News (short for Nothing But Crap) published an article titled, “They Came for Florida Sun and Sand. They Got Rising Costs and a Culture War.” And it’s a masterpiece of cherry picking. Since it’s Florida, you can also call it orange picking. This means that the time has come for:

Gutfeld! song: The reporters come in and what they want is the Democratic narrative. So they will distort the facts because in the media that is the plan. Because their cherry-picked data only tells half the story. A desperate attempt to make money by lying to viewers like you on the news.

mental illness. As we all know, people have been flocking to Florida since the pandemic, like Lizzo flocking to food trucks. But did you know that not everyone is happy, says NBC.

“Hundreds of thousands of new residents have flocked to this state with the promise of beautiful weather, no income taxes, and a lower cost of living, but by 2022, nearly 500,000 will leave… It was a perfect storm of soaring insurance costs and hostile politics’ environment, deteriorating traffic, and extreme weather. ” They got all this from interviews with 12 people. That’s right, in the last two years he’s had 12 people leave the state.

But sadly, I had to admit that Florida is the second fastest growing state as of July 2023, and there are actually more people moving in than moving out. So, as PJ Media’s Stephen Green says of this stupid article, “It’s like claiming that restaurants are losing customers by only counting people who paid their checks and left.”

Of course, that would ruin any story about the so-called escape, but that wasn’t the case. Instead, NBC found a few people to tell their sob stories. One woman who moved from Connecticut to Florida in 2021 complained that she didn’t know it would be “100 degrees at night.”

Florida water temperatures exceed 100 degrees twice this week, possibly setting a world record: ‘It’s a hot tub’

First, when is 100 degrees not the optimal sleeping temperature for a woman? “Oh, it’s so cold.” That should be inscribed on the epitaph, on the tombstone of every woman who ever lived. But it is. She didn’t know Florida was this hot.

Do you think their license plate motto tipped her off? It’s not a dark dark state, it’s a sunshine state, you’re depressed***. That’s why part of this state is called the Panhandle, and the people over 30 who live there have more wrinkles on their faces than a Shar-Pei ball soaked in ice water.

Plus, did you know there is a lot of traffic? Who knew that besides everyone? I have news for you, young lady. When the average driver on any road in America is 84 years old, there will be traffic jams. You see, when she moved to Florida, she didn’t know it was going to be Florida.

She’s like the easily offended comedy club audience member who didn’t read the headliner well, gets angry that the comedian’s sense of humor doesn’t reflect her own, and walks away. Masu.

NBC News also cited consumer prices and insurance rates. Just imagine! Places that are becoming more popular also have higher prices. Meanwhile, in California, you can stay at the Oakland Coliseum on Airbnb for $85 a night. And did you know that if you live in Florida, your home can be damaged by hurricanes? Why didn’t someone tell these people that Florida has hurricanes?

What if Florida sports teams could give us a hint? Oh yeah. He has 16 teams on the Miami Hurricanes. Baseball, basketball, football, even women’s soccer, that’s not even reality. One man said he felt he was dangerous because everyone was walking around with guns.

Oh my god, Florida loves guns. So would you if you were sandwiched between Haiti and Georgia. Has this guy never seen an episode of “Cops”? Do you think it’s a coincidence that the other episodes were filmed in Broward County? He just hears that name and he starts flushing drugs down the toilet.

NBC News also reported that “increasingly conservative Residents are being evacuated from Florida over the government’s “policy”.

In other words, more laws will be enforced, children will no longer be sterilized for playing with the wrong toys, and people will stop thinking that being white is racist. So the only people running away are the liberal dip ****s who never belonged there to begin with. They should run away, because running away from the state is just another way to express the generosity they are known for.

Florida has set a shining example in school choice.Method is as follows

So NBC discovered more than a dozen people, literally a dozen, who moved to Florida with unrealistic expectations and now regret it. Heck, there’s probably a dozen people who say Seth Meyers is funny — just ask any of his writers. But hey, Florida is doing well thanks to Governor DeSantis, so NBC News feels obligated to criticize Florida for treating it like a San Francisco sidewalk.

Now, speaking of San Francisco, a new report from WalletHub ranks it as the healthiest city in the country.

Homeless people are seen on the streets of San Francisco’s Tenderloin District. California Governor Gavin Newsom has directed the National Guard and California National Guard to assist local governments in combating the fentanyl crisis. (Photo by: Tayfun Coskun/Anadolu Agency, Getty Images)

Sure, avoiding street manure is great for aerobic exercise, and outdoor drug use must be good for your lungs. Great job, WalletHub — you manage to overlook little things like crime, homelessness, and the overdose epidemic. What exactly is WalletHub? Well, it’s a financial company.

Where is your headquarters located? Florida.

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The truth is, liberals who want to stay in good standing can’t say anything bad about the nightmares Democrats have caused or good things about Republicans’ successes, but even Democrats don’t really believe that. Just ask girlfriend AOC and girlfriend Gretchen Whitmer, who are vacationing in Florida.