9th degree black belt Diane Reeve Kirby is determined to make the men who attack her regret it. However, she has no illusions about how far her 35 years of training will take her. “Men are usually bigger and stronger than women, and that’s just a fact we have to accept,” says Kirby.
Similarly, women taking Kirby’s classes action self defense They may have fantasies of getting their butts kicked by Scarlett Johansson, but they’re quickly forgotten.
“What I teach is a one-shot game,” Kirby tells me, sitting in the kitchen of his home in Plano, Texas, not far from the school. “If you neutralize, if you destroy, you get out of there. Because if they can’t see you, if they can’t breathe, if they can’t walk, you can Because there is no problem.”
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Kirby’s technique is effective, but I wish he never had to use it in the first place. “Prevention is always good, and I tell my students in class that 90 percent of self-defense is not being chosen as a target in the first place.”
“It’s all about developing very simple habits,” Kirby continues. “But some women may not think about them.”
Kirby calls these the “Five Certain-T”.
1. Trust your instinct
Kirby says women need to trust their instincts, even if it means overcoming social conditioning to be a “good person.”
“‘Be nice, little girls.'” “And you know what I say to them? You throw it out the window. Be nice to everyone but your parents.” There’s no need, and that’s it, and everyone else has to earn it.”
Many women need help reconnecting with this primal instinct.
“Ask them to close their eyes and think about the last time they felt anxious or anxious, and think about what their body is telling them.” Some people stand up on the back of their necks. [feel it] in their bellies. ”
This physiological response tells you that you need to get out of the situation before your brain even has time to process it.
2. Become tough target
According to Kirby, simply showing confidence can thwart predators. When you pass someone, look them in the eye.
“Some women are very shy and hesitant and think they can just keep their heads down and pretend it doesn’t hurt,” Kirby says. “And in fact, the opposite is true.”
Also, don’t text or get distracted by your cell phone.
Kirby advises being aware of your surroundings and maintaining a steady gait, neither too fast nor too slow. “That’s what I call ‘turning your head.’ Not being paranoid, just casually looking around.”
3. think first
When getting from point A to point B, have a plan. Kirby uses the example of leaving school and heading to his car in the parking lot.
“We know where someone might be hiding, and we’re watching.” [those places]. If there’s a car in the parking lot, you know there might be someone on the other side. Even if I see a van parked next to me, I don’t get in the driver’s side of it. ”
In general, think about possible contingencies and how you would respond, says Kirby. “If this happens, I’m going back to the car. If this happens, I’m going back to the car.”
Four. take action
This can be as simple as walking into an open business or crossing the street.
Kirby also alluded to information he received from Plano police officers. If he senses something is wrong, he should call the officer at the non-emergency police desk and ask if he would be willing to fly out his patrol car.
“There’s nothing better than a police car driving down the street to eliminate a lot of despicable acts.”
5. Become tenacious
It is possible to reduce your chances of being targeted, but there are no guarantees. “Anyone can be in the wrong place at the wrong time.”
In the worst-case scenario, you need to give it your all. “You can’t give up,” Kirby says. “You can’t stop fighting.” Kirby calls this quality fortitude, and she says it’s the number one quality a black belt candidate must prove before being promoted.
Be ready to fight anytime, anywhere. “Bad guys don’t jump you when you get out of bed and walk down the street. They don’t jump you when you’ve just run 3 miles or biked 20 miles. I guess.”
After the talk, Kirby took me to her backyard dojo, where she was joined by her husband, Tim Kirby, a highly accomplished martial artist himself. Together they demonstrated some basic moves that even beginners can use against attackers.
Self-defense demo by Diane Reeve Kirbywww.youtube.com
