TIt’s unlikely that Mike and I will meet. We both grew up in Perth. The only problem was he was in Perth, Scotland and I was in Perth, Western Australia. Then we realized that although we live in the same location (Melbourne), he lives an hour away on another side of the city by car.
It was 2014, we had been divorced for about five years, and neither of us had much success with internet dating. It didn’t help that my online profile was set to only show matches who lived within a 5km radius of my home. So, I really wanted to find love, but apparently I wasn’t willing to look further than walking distance from my front door. The algorithm very wisely ignored me and matched me with Mike. I was intrigued by his profile. His headline was “Looking for a woman who makes me laugh.” In my experience, men usually want to be interesting and the center of attention. I thought I could do it.
Mike was late for our first date and I thought he was being stood up (apparently he just didn’t know his way to Port Melbourne), but he ended up running into the pub with a big smile on his face. I was able to do it and stumbled. on low furniture. He was instantly likable, spoke up a storm, was very funny and witty, and at one point he gripped my knee hard, not in a vulgar way, but just in a moment of excitement. We both loved the same dark comedy show, The League of Gentlemen, so much so that we could recite it scene by scene. I had never met anyone else who had seen it either. That night, I went home and told my teenage daughter, and she said, “Mom, you have to marry this person.” I thought, he’s funny, so I made him laugh, let’s see how this goes.
On our second date, it was my turn to be late. I completely misjudged how long it takes for the tram to run down Collins Street on a Saturday night. It was a dark, bitterly cold June night with an icy wind. I dressed to impress, not for the weather. Desperate to be punctual, I brushed my teeth until they were like an iceberg as the tram moved along at a glacial pace. I barely had time to eat before the movie, so I ended up being over 30 minutes late. Will he wait?
I realized that this was the first time in a long time that I had felt so eager to impress a man. I had to run in heels up a slippery and crowded path to the restaurant. Like any sensible person would have thought, he was just sitting in a warm room, but there he was, wearing a silver suit with an orange halo behind him. He was standing there in the dark, waiting for me. I should have taken a picture of him. The whole scene looked like it was part of a movie. In that moment, I knew with absolute certainty that we were going to be together, that this was no longer just a date, this was the next stage of my life.
Three years later, in 2017, Mike surprised me with a romantic proposal in Glenfinnan, Scotland. Our relationship did indeed have its strange side. So he handed me an emerald ring on the shores of Lake Seal. Meanwhile, over his shoulder, he saw a poor, unfortunate man in a yellow waterproof jacket walking toward him. He realized what was happening and panicked. I saw his face and suddenly made a 90 degree turn, pretending I was more interested in admiring the low bushes rather than the spectacular water views I was actually there to see.
When I think back to that second date, everything about Mike was there from the beginning. He was very funny, yet down-to-earth, grounded, reliable and caring. The moment I saw him in the alley, I knew that this was the man who left the comfort of a warm room and went outside, waiting for me in the darkness and cold.
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please share your experience
Do you have a romantic realization you’d like to share? From quiet domestic scenes to dramatic revelations, Guardian Australia wants to hear about the moment you knew you were in love.
