A woman was absolutely right when she left a family party early after the unexpected arrival of her dog triggered an allergy, an etiquette expert and an allergist both told Fox News Digital.
“How stupid would you be to leave a family gathering early because of your cousin’s unannounced pet?” Reddit user “dreamyassistant” asked in a post on the site’s “Am I the A–hole” page on July 15.
In the post, the woman said that her husband’s family holds a reunion every year, “which is a big event where everyone catches up on what’s going on, plays games, and just enjoys each other’s company.”
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But this year, one of her husband’s relatives recently got a dog. “She loves dogs and takes them everywhere. But no one told her a dog would be coming to the reunion.”
Dreamyassistant wrote that she has a “severe dog allergy” and was worried when she saw dogs running around at the reunion.
One Reddit user (not pictured) who is severely allergic to dogs described what happened to her at a recent family reunion, where she was shamed by her husband’s relatives for leaving early after a dog was unexpectedly brought to the gathering. (iStock)
“I came close [the cousin] And I gently reminded her about my allergies, hoping that she would understand and put the dog somewhere else,” she said.
“Instead she got defensive because she didn’t remember that I had allergies. But then she said she’d keep the dog away.”
But it seemed the dog hadn’t left.
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“I tried to join in on the activity but within an hour I started sneezing and my eyes started itching really badly,” the woman wrote in the post. “I couldn’t take it anymore and told my husband I had to leave.”
Her husband “advised me to try harder,” but dreamyassistant decided to quit, much to the disappointment of her husband’s family.
“They severely reprimanded me, saying I ‘overreacted’ and ‘ruined the fun,'” she said.
“They severely reprimanded me, saying I ‘overreacted’ and ‘ruined the fun.'”
“I drove home feeling frustrated and alienated,” she said.
“I left my husband there and a family member drove him home.” Afterwards, “I received several emails from his aunt accusing me of exaggerating and saying that I had made everyone feel uncomfortable by leaving.”
The woman’s husband (not pictured) said he felt caught in the middle of the fracas and wished his wife had stayed at the party, she wrote. (iStock)
dreamyassistant said her husband was also frustrated because he “felt caught in the middle.”
She added: “He didn’t support my decision to leave early and made it very clear that he was disappointed. He thought I should try to control my allergies better and stay for the sake of family,” which made dreamyassistant “feel even more alone.”
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But other family members “understood my situation and told me I was right in prioritizing my health,” she said.
“Right now I feel conflicted because I don’t want to bring tension into my family or create an awkward situation with my husband, but I also feel like my concerns were justified,” she said.
“Pet allergens can remain airborne for up to two months.”
Fox News Digital has reached out to dreamyassistant for the latest updates.
Both an allergist and an etiquette expert told Fox News Digital that the woman made the right decision to leave the event because her allergies were getting out of hand.
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“Even if you remove your pets from the home, pet allergens can remain airborne for up to two months,” Dr. Tania Elliott, a New York-based board-certified allergist, said in an email to Fox News Digital.
Ideally, allergy medication should be taken at least 30 minutes to an hour before exposure, but “you can also take it as soon as you experience symptoms,” she said.
Many Reddit users sided with the woman with the allergy, saying there was nothing wrong with her leaving the party early. (Tiffany Hagler-Geard/Bloomberg via Getty Images)
California-based etiquette expert Rosalinda Randall agreed, saying dreamassistant should prioritize her own health first.
“When we encounter a situation that may affect our well-being, we must take action, preferably without causing any disturbance or inconvenience to our hosts. [make] This is an extreme change,” Randall said in an email.
She continued: “In this case, despite politely asking if it was OK to restrain the dog, the dog was still running wild.”
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Family complaints about the woman sneaking out of a party or encouraging her to take drugs “are none of their business,” Randall said.
“We should never feel the need to gloss over health protocols,” she said. “A lot of people lack interest and [this] Your health affects your business.”
Rosalinda Randall, a California-based etiquette expert, told Fox News Digital that the woman had done nothing wrong by leaving the scene despite feeling unwell. (Rosalinda Randall)
Reddit users largely agreed: Of the 300 or so replies to the post, the majority said people should focus on their health rather than sitting around while they have an allergic reaction.
“Why should I stay in the party if I’m sick, miserable and suffering? I’m sick of people [thinking] “Antihistamines are like a magic bullet that will instantly cure any allergy,” Reddit user “CheerilyTerrified” said in the post’s top reply.
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The same user continued, “Antihistamines can help with allergies, but I have to take them days in advance and while they do minimise symptoms and prevent them from getting too severe, they don’t magically stop you being allergic to anything.”
“Your husband’s lack of care and consideration for you is appalling,” the same commenter said, adding that the husband is apparently more pleased with his wife’s unhappiness than his own family.
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“What is the point of family unity without love and compassion?”
In another top comment, user “Boeing367-80” wrote, “If family togetherness is so important, why didn’t the family just put the dog in a place where there was food, water, and shade, but no access to outside? If they weren’t willing to do that, [dreamyassistant]and family unity was not a priority.”
Others also voiced their opinions.
The antihistamine Benadryl is only effective in certain circumstances, one Reddit user said. (Mario Tama)
“People without allergies don’t understand how badly allergies can affect the body. TV ads give an unrealistic picture of the effectiveness of antihistamines. From that perspective, they’re ignorant,” said user “ludditesunlimited.”
Other Reddit users shared their own experiences with allergies and the misconceptions people have about severe allergies.
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“I have a terrible rabbit allergy, and Benadryl helps me not panic if I come across a rabbit, and buys me enough time to get home, take a shower, and take a nap. Other allergy medicines don’t work, and if I come near a rabbit, Intention Eventually it will cause an asthma attack,” said user “ScroochDown.”
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“I’ve tried almost every allergy medicine out there. none “With this I can spend time outside with my rabbit,” the same user added.
“I’ve had allergy shots and can walk around a room with rabbits, which is an improvement.”
