Dear Abby: Once I grew out of my introverted personality, I started looking for love. I joined a few dating sites and met some great guys and some not so great guys.
One of the latter made me wary from the very first date: we hit it off initially and shared many of the same interests and hobbies, but he wanted to act too quickly.
Our dates were always in public places, but he always wanted to leave me alone at my house or his, and when I asked if another friend could come over, he seemed reluctant.
Then, as my health began to decline, the occasional meet-ups became less important to me.
I told him I had health issues, but the next day he asked me out on another date as if I hadn't told him.
He either started ignoring me or I noticed it more and more. This and other things have caused me to stop responding to him. This situation is now out of control.
He has contacted me on every social media app, on my phone, on email and I am upset for so many reasons but feel guilty about ignoring him.
My family and friends tell me I'm doing the right thing, which is that by replying to his correspondence I'm giving him the impression that I'm open to getting in touch again.
I don't want to talk to him again, but I still feel bad about ignoring him completely. What should I do? — The Perks of Being a Wallflower
For those of you wondering: You may feel guilty because you are ignoring him, but I think it is poor manners.
Send him a text or email and tell him that you haven't responded to his messages because you're not interested in a relationship with him, and that he should stop contacting you.
If he continues to persistently pursue you after that, you may have noticed that he is stalking you, so report it to the police.
Dear Abby: Our son is going to marry a young woman that our family cannot stand.
No matter what we are discussing, she turns the conversation into long, boring stories about her friends, aunts, cousins, etc. No one is interested in these stories and they go on and on.
Her two daughters and their husbands are frighteningly restrictive in their time with her, her husband leaves the room, and even her 95-year-old mother, who is partially deaf, cannot be with her.
My daughters think I should tell my son not to marry her as it will destroy our close family.
He doesn't seem to realize it and seems to love her and it will hurt. Any advice? — Azuma's Confused Mom
Dear Confused Mom: Doing what your daughter says will undoubtedly make your son feel upset and defensive, and it could very well cause a rift between you and your fiancé.
Instead, you might want to talk to your son privately and point out that he needs to shorten his engagement speech, because if he hasn't noticed, it's going on too long and he's literally losing his audience.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren (aka Jeanne Phillips) and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or write to PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
