Dear Abby: I have loved a married man for over 16 years. We started before he was married, but I was married at the time, so he married her. He always said he would never leave his wife, but I hoped he would.
3 weeks ago I told him I can't stay like this anymore and let's have a great life. 2 weeks later he texted me asking if he was still in my heart and said he was having doubts about our marriage. We live 400 miles apart but last weekend I drove down to see him.
He told me he loves me but has never admitted it before and he doesn't know what to do. Now I don't know what to do or how to act. Should I keep looking for someone else in case he doesn't choose me or should I keep in touch so he doesn't lose sight of me? Virginia's broken hearts
To those with broken hearts: This man told you he wasn't going to leave his wife and he's kept his word for 16 years. He said he loved you. Because you drew the lineThis is his attempt to drag you back into a relationship that is stalled. pleaseFor your own sake, don't break up with him and never contact him again.
Dear Abby: Nine years ago, I cut all ties with my mother-in-law after she accused my husband of sexually assaulting my sister-in-law when she was a teenager. My sister-in-law died of starvation nine years ago after being diagnosed with schizophrenia. I haven't spoken to my mother-in-law since then. However, recently, two of my children got married. I'm starting to feel guilty for not telling my mother-in-law that her two grandchildren got married. Should I say something to my mother-in-law? — Illinois feels guilty
To those of you who feel guilty: I think you should talk to her. It's unfortunate that she lost both of her children. If you think it will make her feel better, you and your husband could talk to her about the wedding, but only in the context of healing any rifts that may have been caused by the delusions suffered by your late sister-in-law, who had a mental illness.
Dear Abby: My 21 year old grandson is a pompous, arrogant know-it-all. The problem is that he is rude to me, especially in social situations. He rolls his eyes and swings his arms around as if I have two heads. He is actually a bit of a jerk. I don't know how to deal with him. Should I just ignore him or express my feelings to him? — A tragic old lady from Ohio
Dear Grandma: If you haven't already, make sure you tell him how you feel. He's behaving like an overgrown adolescent, and if his behavior continues, avoid him if possible, just like you would anyone who is disrespectful to you.
P.S. Also, seriously consider “avoiding” him on his birthdays, Christmas, graduations, and other gift-giving occasions.
Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren (aka Jean Phillips) and published by her mother, Pauline Phillips. To contact Dear Abby, please contact us at http://www.DearAbby.com or write to PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
