The man expressed his devastation after learning that his wife had hidden her inability to have children in marriage for years.
Write in Posts that require advice34-year-old first started dating 10 years ago and says she “clicked instantly.”
“From the beginning, I knew she was special. It's just the same sense of humor, the same goals for life (or I thought), and the overwhelming feeling of “this is someone I want to build a life.” .
She dropped a “fertility bomb”
He isn't “forced” about having a child, but he expresses how much he looks forward to becoming a dad, and what a parent she thought she was. He also said he talked about it.
However, a few years after their marriage, when they began discussing what to try for the baby, she dropped a “bomb.”
“She knew she had a medical condition that would make it even before we met. impossible For her to get pregnant. It's unlikely. It's not difficult. impossible. ”
He says he is disappointed that he is unable to have a child, but is deeply hurt by betrayal. According to his wife, she kept the secret from fears that he would end the relationship.
“She said, 'I don't want to lose me' and by the time we reached this point I wanted her to love her so much that it didn't matter. ”
“She misrepresents who she is.”
He didn't know what to do next and was in conflict between loving history with her, but it was also filled with deception.
A fellow user was given advice quickly – the overwhelming emotion is leaving.
“Even if you loved her enough, that wouldn't be a problem, she completely misrepresented the person you fell in love with. Not only the kids, but multiple without hitting your eyelashes. “You can lie about the year. What else is she lying about?” one wrote.
Another added that he was stripped of his ability to make informed decisions.
“Wanting a child is a basic life choice, and she knew from the beginning that this was impossible for her. Instead of being honest, she attacks you and you're in love I want to accept it after it falls. It's not love – it's an emotional manipulation.”
In reply to the comment, the original poster said he is still unsure of what to do next, but is leaning towards divorce.
“I feel totally betrayed and trust is a huge deal for me. But I don't want to blame her for anything she couldn't control. It's her medical condition.” He says.
“I care deeply about her, but I don't know if I'll get through this. I'm struggling to see how to rebuild my trust after this, so I'm leaning towards leaving. It's there.”
