Sometimes, taking a step back from your team is the best choice.
For a head coach, there’s always another game around the corner, another trip, or another practice. In women’s professional soccer, this cycle goes on for nearly 11 months each year.
Yet, I remind my players that we are human beings above all else. My journey into fatherhood taught me a hard lesson—work often overshadowed my family when they needed me the most.
So, when my daughter Laia was born just a few months ago, I knew I had to approach things differently. This time, I opted for five weeks of paternity leave in the middle of the season with Gotham FC, which is currently the top team in the National Women’s Soccer League and was the 2025 champion.
I truly wish I had made that choice back in 2021.
Back then, I had just joined Real Betis Feminas in Seville. When my wife, Laura, revealed that she was pregnant, we were at a low point in the league, battling to avoid relegation.
It was a challenging time at work. I poured my energy into the team, turned things around, and managed to end up 12th, ensuring our survival.
Then, in my second season as head coach, my son was finally born.
Luka arrived on a Thursday. I coached a game the night before and, while Laura was still in the hospital, I spent Friday at home with my new family. The very next day, I was back on the field again.
In Spain, new parents can take up to 16 weeks of leave. However, I simply couldn’t think about that. The team was still in distress, lacking the resources or structure to allow for it.
I sought out small ways to be home more, like opting for flights to away games instead of the bus, but that didn’t yield much change.
I still carry the regret of not being the husband and father my family needed during that critical period. I wanted to be in two places at once, yet ultimately disappointed both my wife and son.
“Parental leave still feels like a difficult decision for American men. We are a country where hard work is important, but we are also a place where family is a core value.”
Juan Carlos Amoros
Fast forward four years, when we learned we were expecting a daughter, everything had changed.
Our family relocated from Spain to Houston and then to New York. During that time, Laura made significant sacrifices in her career to support me and look after our son.
Professionally, my situation had improved. I had spent three stable and successful years with Gotham, working with a trustworthy coaching staff.
When Laia was born on April 20th, I hadn’t planned on a lengthy break. We had many commitments. I figured I’d take a few days off intermittently or occasionally skip travel while family came to help Laura recover.
However, by June, that support started to dwindle. Coinciding with this, Luka began his summer vacation, and life with a newborn became increasingly overwhelming.
That’s when I realized I genuinely needed those five weeks off. Being present for my family felt essential. Laura had endured so much, and it felt right to step in for her.
You can feel the difference already. When you’re not physically present with your child, or constantly coming and going, it affects your bond significantly.
Even at home, the pressures of coaching left me mentally drained at times.
Spending this time together helped us adjust to being a family of four. It made our bond stronger, eased some of the pressure, and allowed Laura the space she needed to recover. Most importantly, I was close to my kids in ways I had never experienced before.
Personally, I feel the benefits as well. I’m in a better mental space, which positively impacts my performance at work.
Yet, I didn’t make this decision alone.
The support system we created at Gotham made all of this possible. I’ve worked closely with my assistant coach Sean Harris and the technical team for years—they understand me, the players, and our goals.
My confidence in the coaching staff ensured that the team could manage in my absence, and I trusted Gotham FC’s owner, Carolyn Tisch, and everyone at the club to support me in the way they have always done.
I’m also grateful to the players. Life throws many challenges our way—like illness, loss, and important family events—and we strive to support one another. I’ve always wanted to cultivate that kind of atmosphere for my team, and it meant a great deal knowing they had my back when I needed it.
I realize not everyone may agree with my choices. I certainly felt apprehensive about how people would react when I shared my desire to take a break. Ultimately, the most important opinions are those of the players and my colleagues, and they’ve been incredibly supportive.
What strikes me is that even today, taking parental leave seems like such a daunting decision for men in the U.S. We live in a culture that values hard work while also placing a high regard on family.
So, I’m puzzled as to why more men don’t take the opportunity to step away when they can or why companies don’t do more to facilitate this.
This is partly why I wanted to share my story. I hope to encourage other men that it’s perfectly fine to make that choice when their family needs them.
Because you can’t turn back time. Some moments in life are fleeting, and if you miss them, they’re gone forever. I believe we should all reflect on what can wait and what can’t.
After all, a child is only small for a limited time. If I can inspire just one hesitant new dad to muster the courage to take that necessary time during these special moments, it will be worth it.
I know he won’t regret it. I certainly don’t.
