Dear Abby Responses

Dear Abby: I have a new best friend, and I’m in a bit of a dilemma about whether I should let her in on my husband’s secrets. Before we got close, I found out he had been sexting and sending nude pictures to two women I know. He tends to make inappropriate jokes, and recently he’s been sending me uncomfortable messages. Even if he says it’s a joke, it still doesn’t sit right with me.

My partner has decided he doesn’t want to see these women as a couple anymore, which puts me in a tough spot. I care about my friend, and I’m left wondering if she should know about all this. What’s my best move here? — Arkansas Truth Teller

Dear Truth Teller: You should be honest with your new best friend and explain the reason behind your partner’s decision not to interact with her and her husband as a couple. If she doubts you, see if her husband is willing to discuss his issues with the friends involved. It seems he might have personal problems that could impact their marriage, so it’s crucial she understands what’s potentially at stake.

Dear Abby: My sister, “Maggie,” underwent brain surgery to remove a cyst last year. Ever since, she has had memory issues, struggles with obesity, and has balance difficulties. She has been living with her daughter lately and loves spending time with her granddaughters. However, my daughter, who is pregnant with her third child, along with her military family, will be moving in seven months, and we need to make plans for Maggie. She is hesitant to discuss her future, stating she just wants to “go home and die.” What should I do? — Supportive Big Sister from the South

Dear Sister: Your sister will need a new living arrangement once her niece and family leave. It’s uncertain whether Maggie can live on her own, making it vital to assess her both psychologically and neurologically. Consulting a doctor who specializes in neurology or geriatrics could help with this.

If it’s determined that she can’t live independently anymore, consider looking into assisted living facilities that can offer the necessary support. If that isn’t an option, perhaps a social worker can assist in finding home care for her.

Dear Abby: A kind friend recently gifted me something quite expensive that I already own. She’s in a tight financial situation, making it even harder for her to give gifts like this. I returned the item to the seller, but the refund will come back to me, not her. I’m thinking about giving the refund to my friend.

She doesn’t have to give gifts for us to be friends, but I’m concerned it might upset her. I’ve asked her multiple times to stop giving gifts, yet she continues despite them being unusable for us. What I really want is just her company. What should I do? — Presence, not a present

Dear PNP: This is a delicate situation. Have an open conversation with her about how much you value her friendship but don’t need physical gifts. You likely have more than enough already. However, you really would enjoy something like baked goods from her kitchen. (You know what they say, right? “I can’t believe I love you like this…”)