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Graduation ceremonies canceled: How disappointed grads can overcome ‘milestone FOMO’

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Four years ago, many high school graduates were unable to attend traditional ceremonies due to the pandemic, and this year, some of those same students are missing out on graduation ceremonies. university graduation ceremony As political protests continue.

Columbia University and the University of Southern California have both announced the cancellation of their traditional “main stage” graduation ceremonies in 2024.

At other universities, including the University of Michigan, ceremonies were disrupted by anti-Israel demonstrators.

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“Regardless of how you feel about the recent protests, it is important to recognize that our graduates, their families, and friends were caught up in the aftermath of the 2018 riots.” university campus” Zachary Ginder, a psychological consultant in Riverside, Calif., told Fox News Digital.

As they grieve the loss of this commemorative event, some graduates may experience “milestone FOMO.” In other words, feel disappointed, angry, feel depressed and anxious About their future as they prepare to enter the real world.

Graduates attend commencement ceremonies Saturday, May 11, 2024, at UNC-Chapel Hill. Earlier in the day, students vandalized the rector’s building in protest of the Hamas-Israel war. (Fox News Digital Image Direct)

Here’s what’s important to know:

What is “Milestone FOMO”?

Milestone FOMO (fear of missing out) refers to the fear of missing out on important life events or milestones that others may be experiencing or achieving.

“It can also be described as a type of envy where people watch their friends reach major milestones in life, such as getting married or getting married. Buy a houseAnd this contributes to people feeling left out or not equal to their peers,” Nicolette Rianza, a therapist at LifeStance Health in Ohio, told Fox News Digital.

Alumni FOMO

While grieving the loss of life’s important celebrations, some new graduates may experience “milestone FOMO.” That means you’ll feel disappointed, angry, depressed, and anxious about the future as you prepare to enter the real world. (St. Petersburg)

For graduates, experiencing milestone FOMO can lead to a decreased sense of accomplishment, she says.

“We all want to be rewarded after working hard, and we can think of the pomp and atmosphere of a graduation ceremony as a reward for our efforts,” Leenza said.

“So when graduates are not allowed to celebrate their accomplishments, they may feel like all their hard work has been wasted and they have missed out on a rite of passage.”

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Ginder points out that for many people, graduation is not only the culmination of years of hard work and dedication, but also an important transition into adulthood and the next stage of life. .

“Missing this milestone event can cause feelings of sadness, loss, grief, disappointment and incompleteness for those involved,” he said.

“When graduates are not allowed to celebrate their accomplishments, they may feel like all their hard work has been wasted and they have missed out on a rite of passage.”

“It is not difficult to imagine the pain that must have been felt by those who had worked toward their goal for more than four years, only to have their culmination and official visibility disappear just days before the event.”

Students may feel “deprived of the opportunity” to celebrate their accomplishments with classmates, teachers and loved ones, Ginder said.

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“The lack of closure and concrete indicators for this important transition can make it difficult to process and move forward with this final chapter of life,” he added. Ta.

4 ways to combat ‘milestone FOMO’

Experts have suggested four ways for graduates who can’t hold the ceremony to process and overcome their emotions in the aftermath.

1. Focus on recognizing and accepting your emotions.

“Sadness, anger, disappointment and frustration are all normal reactions to loss,” Ginder told FOX News Digital.

“Graduates should take time to process these emotions with the perspective that life is a journey with ups and downs.”

graduation cap

For many people, graduation is not only the culmination of years of hard work and dedication, but also a pivotal transition into adulthood and the next stage of life, one expert notes. . (St. Petersburg)

For many people, graduation does not define their life university careerGinder pointed out.

“Refocusing on gains, friendships, and positive memories can help you overcome the severe emotional challenges of missing out on graduation.”

2. Challenge and reframe unhelpful thoughts

According to Ginder, students working through this disappointment can develop negative thoughts such as, “I’ll never experience this milestone again” or “My grades don’t matter anymore.” That’s what it means.

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“When these thoughts come to the surface, graduates can replace them with more thoughts. balanced thinkingThings like “I can find other ways to celebrate my hard work” and “My accomplishments are worth it even if there’s no traditional ceremony.”

3. Create your own ceremony

“Planning a more personal graduation ceremony where your closest friends and family celebrate your accomplishments can be a great way to commemorate this special occasion,” Leenza said.

“Wearing full graduation attire, having a loved one deliver a moving speech, or even walking across a symbolic or makeshift stage may help graduates recognize their accomplishments. do not have.”

cap and gown

“The lack of closure and concrete indicators for this important transition can make it difficult to process and move forward with this final chapter of life,” the experts said. (St. Petersburg)

If you have a campus nearby, Ginder suggests visiting with family and friends, taking photos, and sharing and appreciating all the good things that happened during your school career to ease the pain. Masu.

4. Appreciate what you have achieved, not what you have lost.

“Human nature is to focus on the negative, and while graduation is an important milestone, it is not the end of the journey,” Ginder said.

He added that while acknowledging the loss, graduates can also “feel gratitude” for what they have gained and the good that exists in this moment.

“Human nature is to focus on the negative, and while graduation is an important milestone, it is not the end of the journey.”

“If that’s difficult, try taking action toward the future, such as setting short-term and long-term goals and shifting your focus to the next steps in your life,” Ginder advised.

How parents and loved ones can help

Leanza said families should acknowledge that graduates are saddened and disappointed by their losses.

“Encourage them to talk about it, and give them your full attention when they share their feelings with you,” she suggested.

mother holds her daughter

Experts say families should acknowledge that graduates are saddened and disappointed by their loss. (St. Petersburg)

Encouraging acceptance also helps graduates process their emotions, Leenza said.

“Accepting something doesn’t mean you have to like it. It just means accepting the facts of the situation,” she said.

“This acceptance allows you to focus your energy on dealing with the situation rather than avoiding or denying it.”

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Help new graduates plan their next steps. For example, updating your resume or resume. looking for a job — it could be another way to show them support, she said.

Loved ones may also be able to help find other ways to celebrate and recognize graduates’ accomplishments, such as organizing a surprise graduation ceremony or party to lift their spirits, Leenza said.

graduation

“We all want a reward after working hard. The pomp and atmosphere of a graduation ceremony can be thought of as a reward for one’s efforts.” (St. Petersburg)

Ginder said parents and family members can help by acknowledging graduates’ feelings without minimizing or ignoring them, finding alternative ways to celebrate and acknowledge their graduation accomplishment, and offering support and encouragement.

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“Everyone deals with loss differently,” he says. “While some may not see this as a huge loss, others may find it very difficult to overcome.”

If you are a graduate who is finding it difficult to overcome this problem, and it is starting to interfere with your daily life and mood, we recommend the following: seek professional help Ginder said it’s a message from a qualified clinician.

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