Casual Sex and Modern Relationships: Insights from Dr. Debra Soh

Many in Gen Z were led to believe that casual sex is harmless, all while they were being promised meaningful connections through dating apps. Dr. Debra Soh argues that this trend, particularly impacting young women, is leading to unexpected consequences.

“I don’t believe casual sex benefits anyone, but it seems to be particularly detrimental for women,” Dr. Soh explained in an interview. She elaborates that men and women experience emotional attachments differently after intimate encounters.

“Women generally form stronger attachments following sex,” she noted, contrasting it with men, who tend to revert to their baseline hormonal levels. “As a result, men can disengage and lose interest after sex,” she emphasized.

This perspective drives Dr. Soh to express concern about the influence of various feminist figures who encourage young women to pursue casual relationships or even engage in one-night stands. “Such advice encourages behavior that is likely to be self-destructive,” she remarked. She believes this behavior reflects a competitive dynamic among women and men seeking partners.

“It’s truly disheartening, especially when I see it in Gen Z women,” she added. “I also think Millennials might have bought into this belief that casual encounters aren’t significant. The prevailing notion seems to be that if men can engage casually, women can too.”

Yet, the problems in modern relationships extend beyond casual sex. There are obvious pitfalls to swiping left or right on dating apps, which often leads to superficial judgments based on appearance, as pointed out during the discussion.

“It’s fascinating, really,” said her interview counterpart. “Our ancestors didn’t have such a vast pool of potential partners at their fingertips, let alone the chance to evaluate them based on profiles and pictures.”

Dr. Soh further highlighted the concept of the paradox of choice, noting research that suggests people are more content with their decisions when they have fewer options. “When using dating apps, having seemingly limitless options creates a constant search for something better, making it difficult to commit,” she explained.

“It does seem like a lot of us aren’t fully engaged during the dating process,” she added thoughtfully. “This is a side effect of modern connectivity and how much romantic interaction happens online.”