Johnny Manuel still remembers the moment his football career went awry.
He remembers the lights and the crowd at Radio City Music Hall in New York City on draft night in 2014, walking onto the stage after being drafted in the first round by the Cleveland Browns after a successful college career.
And most of all, he remembers the terrible depression that followed.
“I had the chance to walk across the stage at Radio City Music Hall and be the No. 1 draft pick in the NFL. I had everything I wanted in life. I had the money, I had the fame. … And somehow, when I got there and I had everything I wanted, I think I just felt more empty inside than I'd ever felt before,” Manziel said during a question-and-answer session with students and recovering addicts at the University of Alabama's annual VitAL Health Conference on Monday. The footage was obtained by Fox News Digital.
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Cleveland Browns quarterback Johnny Manuel leaves the field after a loss to the Kansas City Chiefs at Arrowhead Stadium on December 27, 2015 in Kansas City, Missouri. (Peter G. Aiken/Getty Images)
“I think that's when I really pivoted and started isolating myself and focusing on doing the wrong things – doing things that would make me feel good temporarily, or make me happy temporarily. And so I slowly started to learn what depression was.”
At the time, Manziel entered the NFL after a two-year run as one of the greatest college football stars in history, a season at Texas A&M that included a Heisman Trophy, a historic, shocking win over Alabama, numerous record-breaking stints and an ignominious suspension for illegally signing autographs in exchange for money.
But his star faded quickly in Cleveland. Manziel checked into rehab in April 2015, just four months after his rookie season, and was released by the Browns shortly after his sophomore season in 2016. Continuing alcohol and drug problems reportedly heavily impacted his standing with the team.
Manziel said his drinking problem worsened during his struggles in football.
“As much as I loved football and as good as I was at football, I think there was one thing I got really good at in college and high school, and that was partying,” Manziel said Monday. “Once my football life started to open back up, I guess I turned to another thing that I was really good at.”
Manziel's NFL performance reflected his changing priorities. He appeared in just eight games over two seasons and went 2-6, with his only two wins coming against the 3-13 Tennessee Titans and 5-11 San Francisco 49ers in 2015. Manziel finished with 1,675 passing yards, seven touchdowns, seven interceptions, completed 57% of his passes and was sacked 22 times.
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Johnny Manisel laughs on the field during a Week 7 game of the Fan Controlled Football season on May 28, 2022, in Atlanta. (Brett Carlsen/Fan Controlled Football/Getty Images)
Former Browns coach Mike Pettine, who was involved in the Manziel draft decision, acknowledged to reporters in December 2015 that the Browns didn't see these issues while Manziel was still in college, and said the team appeared to be acquiring a completely different player than the one they had at Texas A&M.
“You know the public perception,” Pettine said of Manziel's pre-draft analysis that year, “I don't think we anticipated the extent of his issues and challenges and how deep-rooted they were.”
The difference is that Manziel experienced depression after being drafted by Cleveland.
Manziel has said in the past that in addition to alcohol, a cocaine overdose in 2015 caused him to lose 40 pounds.
But in a February 2018 interview with “Good Morning America,” Manziel said he planned to quit drinking completely.
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Texas A&M Aggies player Johnny Manziel celebrates a third quarter touchdown during a game against the Rice Owls at Kyle Field on August 31, 2013 in College Station, Texas. (Scott Halleran/Getty Images)
Manziel suggested Monday in Alabama that he's been avoiding alcohol for some time now.
“Alcohol was harmful and drugs were harmful to the life I wanted to lead. I didn't realize that until it was too late. The way I see things, and the way I see them now, alcohol doesn't need to be in my life. It doesn't do me any good. Going out and drinking and using drugs isn't going to make me any better,” Manziel said.
“I want to live a healthier, purer lifestyle, but it's taken me a long time to get there.”
Manziel will join the Action Network's podcast “Big Bets on Campus” this week as a college football commentator, the company announced Wednesday.
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