Dear Abby: I’ve been with my boyfriend for nine years. He’s kind, devoted, funny, and an exceptional cook—seriously, he’s one of the best. We live together with two overly indulged Yorkies, who are basically the center of his universe. He even prepares gourmet meals for them. And no, I’m not kidding.
Just last week, the dogs had wagyu steak with reduced bone broth. Meanwhile, we had old turkey sandwiches and chips from the fridge. Sure, I like dogs; I mean, I do think of them as family, but I’m beginning to feel like I’m just a roommate. It’s like the VIP is dining at an upscale restaurant while I’m left with leftovers. He treats me well in lots of ways, but honestly, is it too much to ask for some equal treatment when it comes to meals? – Next to Yorkies
Dear Next to Yorkies: If he cooks exclusively for the dogs, how can you truly gauge his cooking skills? Are the pups wagging their tails in approval, or is there more to it? What’s he eating while whipping up these fancy dinners? If your only option was an expired turkey sandwich, then it sounds like you need to have a candid conversation with him. Your feelings matter, and clearly, this is bothering you enough to seek advice.
Dear Abby: I’m a gay man who has been with my husband for over 30 years. He hails from a different culture, as does our now-adult adopted child. My family is largely conservative, both religiously and politically. They accepted my sexuality since my 20s, but they’ve frequently voiced criticism regarding cultural and racial differences. I’ve wrestled with this for a long time and have sought professional help.
After losing my parents, I’ve tried to keep a cordial relationship with my siblings and other relatives, but it’s becoming increasingly tough amid today’s political climate. Recently, I’ve seen some family members post anti-gay and anti-immigrant sentiments online. Some are so vile that I’m not sure I can stay in touch with them. It’s hurtful and disappointing, and I feel like I’m reaching a breaking point. How should I approach this? Is it worth expressing my feelings now, or would it just lead to more conflict without any real change? – Breakpoints in Texas
Dear Breakpoints: It’s essential to voice your feelings to those relatives who are sharing hurtful posts. They need to understand the impact of their words. Remind yourself that social media messages can be harmful, even if they seem distant. If their content is making you uncomfortable, it’s reasonable to limit your exposure to that negativity. Your well-being matters, and it’s completely valid to prioritize it.
Dear Abby was established by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and originally founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. For more information, visit www.dearabby.com or write to PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
