My husband keeps poking fun at me in public.

Dear Abby

I’ve been married for 49 years, and like any long relationship, it’s had its highs and lows. Recently, my husband “Sid” made a comment in a store that really bothered me. You see, I tend to use my hands when I talk, and while I was in the middle of a conversation, a woman walked by. Sid decided to warn her, saying, “Be careful! She’s mean! She’s violent!”

Then at another store, he told the cashier, “Be careful! She’s dangerous! She’ll steal something! She’s shoplifting.” When we got back to the car, he commented, “Man, why did you buy more cookies? You’ve already eaten that whole pack!”

When I brought this up to him, he just said, “You’re like your mother,” which made me cry. The next day, I explained to him that his comments hurt my feelings. His response was, “You’ve always been too sensitive. You need to get over it.” I’m really unsure about how to handle this ongoing “pushing.” – I don’t enjoy it in Florida

Dear Reader: It sounds like your husband has a tendency to embarrass you in public, and it seems to be something he gets a kick out of. Wipe those tears and try to smile when it happens. Maybe gently tell the cashier to ignore him because he’s out of sorts. Without knowing the full story, it’s hard to say why he behaves this way, but talking to a marriage or family therapist could really help. Don’t wait too long to seek assistance.

Dear Abby

Lately, I’ve been feeling really anxious about major surgery and the possibility of cancer. Even though I don’t have cancer, I can’t stop thinking about death—not just my own, but also that of my husband, dog, and cat. The thought of being alone is terrifying. Plus, I’m grappling with my beliefs about God.

I’ve never felt so unhappy; I find myself crying every day. My body aches, and fear seems to be a constant companion. I’m 57, and the idea of my life ending feels closer than before. I don’t know how to help myself. The thought of losing my family is unbearable. How do people manage to live without worrying about death? – Scary in the South

Dear Scary: Anyone who has confronted thoughts of their own mortality might understand how valuable life is—it’s why we should treasure each day. None of us has a guarantee on how long we have.

If you haven’t talked about how you’re feeling with your doctor, you really need to. Also, ask for referrals to licensed mental health professionals who can help you tackle these heavy thoughts. You deserve to enjoy your life, regardless of how long or short it may be. Finding your balance is key.