Listen, I don’t want anyone offside, really. But the hot tip for all the smug couples out there is to back off.
I say this with love, light, and jazz. But the question keeps coming up: “Why aren’t you married yet?” This question completely drives us single people, and happily unmarried couples, crazy.
Suzanne, why aren’t you divorced yet? Huh? why!
We don’t ask you deeply personal questions that are filled with traumatic answers, but you do, married people are smug. and. still. you. do.
So this week I found myself with unbridled joy when I came across a divorce lawyer’s emotional rant about how people are crazy about getting married.
To explain the situation, attorney James Sexton, who has been a divorce lawyer for 20 years, recently spoke on the TikTok channel @welovethatquote about the issue. I’m not being dramatic when I say his words were symbolic.
“If you really break it down, 56 percent of marriages end in divorce,” Sexton said. “And that’s just couples who actually go through the costly, tedious, and emotionally destructive process of divorce.” he said. What about other married people who live together “for the sake of the kids or because they don’t want to give away half of what they have”?
Sexton estimated this to be “at least 20 percent.” He further states: “We’ve now developed technology that has a 76% chance of failure. That’s insane. If I said to you today there’s a 76% chance that a bowling ball will hit you in the head when you walk out the door. , you either don’t go outside or you wear a helmet.”
But wait…he’s not done yet…
“Marriage literally falls under the legal definition of negligence,” Sexton said, “because marriage is an important standard that legal professionals use to assess risk: whether you have less to lose by not doing something. It falls short of the burden, probability, and loss analyzes used to determine the than the risk of doing harm.
“Marriage is an inherently negligent act. It’s like having a pet lion. The chances of someone getting seriously hurt are very high.”
He finally summed it all up by saying, “If you have this idea that you should get married, and you don’t, there’s something wrong with you.”
Well, well, that certainly doesn’t seem to be the case. I’ve never liked math, but the numbers don’t lie. I would like to abandon the idea that maybe we unmarried people are smarter. Selfish? Who am I?
To be fair, my heart goes out to those of us who are stuck in our marriages due to financial or family pressures. It must be a horrible feeling to be trapped in a relationship that no longer works.
Sure, we single people deal with ghosting, breadcrumbing, and numerous other dating dilemmas. But are we really stuck in a relationship we don’t want to be in? no.
So why do people continue to do it despite the odds against them? I blame fairy tales and social norms. Yes, those boring ones.
But the surprising news is that 89 percent of the world’s population lives in countries where marriage rates are declining. Indeed, from 2019 to 2021, the annual number of marriages in Japan plummeted by almost one-sixth, to just over 500,000. wild.
In the United States, the number of marriages has declined by 60 percent since the 1970s. And in Australia, one in seven Australian adults now have a de facto partner, following a sharp decline in marriage among people under the age of 35.
So, the question is certainly: “Why not get married yet?” is seriously outdated. Can we let this issue rest in peace along with outdated questions like “When are we going to have a child?” “Oh, is it that time already?” and “Why are you single?” These are do-or-die questions. Die.
Then exhale.
But listen, if I had the chance, would I have a pet lion? yes. yes i will. And what if Brad Pitt gave me a big fat diamond ring and asked me to marry him? That’s it again. yes i will.
It’s not embarrassing.
