You've probably seen the slogan “Love is love” (or some variation thereof) on T-shirts, bumper stickers, posters, or in ads and social media posts by major companies like Facebook, Coke, and Vans. Or Nordstrom.
On the surface, to many, it sounds like an undeniable axiom. Who would be so backwards as to try to put limits on love? Companies that remind us of this adage have the air of moral teachers. How can you feel confident purchasing a product if you don't know that the manufacturer is on the right side of history?
Rather than the self-centered love that comes naturally to aestheticians, Biblical love is other-centered.
But since the phrase “love is love” is so pervasive and captures so well some of our culture's misdirections, I'm curious to know what this slogan means and its I would like to consider some of the implications and contrast them with a richer and deeper Christian view of love. And it will not harm humanity, but will lead to its prosperity.
Anyone who understands the culture probably knows what “love is love” is trying to convey, but it goes something like this: typical details: “The phrase 'love is love' is often used to express the belief that love is a universal human experience and that all forms of love are valid and equal.” This phrase also implies that love should not be limited or judged based on factors such as gender, sexual orientation, or other social categories. ”
love is?
Our culture is full of ideas about love. Popular songs from all musical genres are dedicated to this theme, and it has been the subject of countless TV shows, movies, articles, and books.
Most people in the West's view of love has been shaped by an understanding of human nature born of the Enlightenment, which came to be called “expressive individualism” and the “autonomous self.” As a result, most Westerners now consider their life goal to be personal self-expression and the realization of a unique identity. Unlike previous times when identity was primarily defined by one's community and faith, today's identity is focused on individual desires and self-expression.
Initially, the kind of love envisioned in “Love Is Love” is primarily a romantic emotion, the joy that others can contribute to our personal desires, goals, and preferences.
Think about just about every love song, almost every rom-com, and almost every romance novel that's been popular over the past few decades. This is the implicit idea of love.
As we will see, this is a thin, hollow version compared to the Biblical view of love. focused on self-actualization.
As the late Timothy Keller insightfully observed, drawing on Søren Kierkegaard, this modern understanding of love naturally boils down to what Kierkegaard called it. aesthetic (As we all are naturally, apart from our regeneration in Christ).
In her book, The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with Divine Wisdom, Keller explains:
Estheticians don't ask if it's good or bad, they just ask if it's interesting. Everything is judged on whether it is engaging, thrilling, exciting and interesting. … Aestheticians often claim to be free individuals. Life, he says, should be thrilling and full of “beauty and splendor.” And that often means shedding the shackles of societal expectations and community bonds. But Kierkegaard says this is a very mistaken idea of what freedom is. A person who lives an aesthetic life has not mastered himself at all. In fact, he lives a life of chance. His temperament, tastes, emotions and impulses drive him completely.
The tragedy of this approach to love is that “if the wife loses her beautiful skin and face, or the husband gains weight, the esthetician begins to look for someone more beautiful. If the spouse suffers from a debilitating disease, , the esthetician begins to feel that life is meaningless.
This is because, as Keller writes, “the esthete does not really love the person; he or she loves the emotion, the thrill, the ego rush, the experience that the other person brings; the evidence is that , when those things disappear, the esthetician has no lasting consideration or interest in anything else.”
“Love” without boundaries?
Putting aside our dismissive view of love, we should embrace the proposition of “love in all its forms.'' [romantic or sexual] Love is valid and equal. ” Even committed secularists will balk at some of the implications of this purported principle.
What will happen to the love between father and daughter? Or a romance between an adult and a minor? Is love between humans and animals okay? What about multiple wives or husbands (i.e. polygamy)? What if causing or experiencing physical pain was part of the love affair? What if you prefer to love Avatar?
Are we really ready to say that each of these forms of “love” is as valid as a traditional marital relationship? Even if individuals in these types of relationships consent, are we ready to normalize and celebrate them?
a better story
It is clear that not all “love” is acceptable love, even if it contains strong emotions and desires.
In all cultures, past and present, humans have recognized and established boundaries regarding sexual relationships. Sexuality was never restricted. This comes from the moral law that God wrote on the hearts of all mankind (Romans 2:14-15).
Given the naturalism that permeates the West, it's no wonder that issues like love and sexuality are seen as personal choices. no moral implications. But God, who created us and knows what will help us and what will harm us, has revealed His will regarding relationships and sexuality in His Word.
As a result, as Glyn Harrison points out in her book “A Better Story: God, Sex, and Human Flourishing'':
We flourish as human beings when we work in harmony with God's reality. we are [do this]we are on the path to becoming fully human. Therefore, the path to human flourishing…is to work with the grain of God's reality rather than trying to create our own reality.
Although we may be irritated by the seeming restrictions on our freedom, God established marriage between natal male and natal female as the only relationship suitable for sexual expression. Because that's how we were designed to function and thrive.
This also means embracing the kind of love that God reveals and commands in the Bible. Rather than the self-centered love that comes naturally to aestheticians, Biblical love is other-centered.
As one scholar puts it in the New Theological Dictionary, this love is “not based on a felt need in the beloved, nor on a desire evoked by some attractive feature of the beloved. ” …Rather, it emanates from a heart of love and is directed toward blessing the other person and seeking his or her highest good. ”
The apostle Paul describes this love of God as being patient, kind, not proud, not arrogant, not selfish, not easily angered, and forgiving. “It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” (1 Corinthians 13:7).
It's sacrificial love.
Keller says that our culture “holds personal freedom, autonomy, and fulfillment as our highest values.” But “a thoughtful person knows deep down that any romantic relationship means losing all three.”
In “The Four Loves,” C.S. Lewis writes that if we want to protect our hearts from the vulnerabilities that God’s love might bring, we must confine it “in the casket or coffin” of selfishness. I admitted that I can do it. “But in that coffin, safe, dark, motionless, airless, things will change. It will not break. It will become indestructible, impenetrable, irrevocable. .”
This is the end result of selfish love in this world. God's love, on the other hand, is glorious, abundant, and life-giving.
This article is adapted from the following posts: originally appeared in Worldview News Substack.
