New Yorkers are grappling with a wave of loneliness, high dining costs, and a complicated dating landscape. Yet, a growing number of savvy individuals are opting for underground dinner parties as a way to build community.
These intimate gatherings range from swanky penthouse dinners on the Upper East Side, featuring truffle risotto and martinis, to lively backyard setups in Bed-Stuy, where beautifully arranged tables create a warm, laughter-filled atmosphere. For many fashionable city-dwellers, these ticketed meals, where strangers dine together, have emerged as a fresh alternative for a night out.
Bernadette King Fitzsimmons, a Brooklyn local, frequently attends the Heirloom Supper Club, which takes place in the inviting brownstone of roommates Julian Tineo and Madison Scott in Bushwick. Fitzsimmons recalls her first time there: “Two years ago, I showed up alone, and I was really nervous. But by the end of the evening, I connected with someone who became a close friend.”
While the thought of shelling out money to dine in someone else’s home with unfamiliar faces might not appeal to everyone, Fitzsimmons finds it far preferable to the chaos of downtown bars where one struggles to converse over loud music. “People are more inclined to engage in conversation at these dinner parties,” she points out. “Being in someone’s home makes it feel more welcoming.”
Tineo and Scott have been hosting these events since 2023. They recognized the challenge young adults face in meeting new people outside of work or school. Their gatherings, which started small, have grown in popularity, prompting the duo to adopt a more organized approach with ticket sales and an increased social media presence.
To keep the experience accessible, they offer a pay-what-you-can model starting at $65. “We believe everyone should have the opportunity to join in the fun,” Tineo explains. They do not specifically select guests or request demographic info—it’s a bit of a gamble for everyone involved.
Nico Mann, another regular, emphasizes the need for connection in a city that can often feel isolating. “These dinners gather those who genuinely want to engage with others,” he reflects.
Every dinner concludes with thanks to guests for choosing to spend their evening with new acquaintances, acknowledging the courage it takes to step outside one’s comfort zone.
The dinner party trend is flourishing in New York, with few restrictions on home-hosted gatherings, apart from some city permits for events in public spaces.
Reimagining Shabbat Dinners
Schtick New York offers a novel take on traditional Friday dinners, blending Jewish customs with modern flair. For $150 per person, guests enjoy a lively candlelit gathering led by Jacqueline Lobel, who aims to infuse a sense of fun into the Shabbat experience.
Five years on, Shtick has transformed into a biweekly event. Lobel emphasizes the need for a more relatable approach to Jewish culture, steering away from the often serious connotations associated with it. Her vision creates an inviting space where people can connect over food and wine, free from archaic stereotypes.
First-time attendee Kayla Moody recalls being pleasantly surprised. “The conversations flowed naturally, and I left feeling energized,” she said, highlighting the genuine connections formed over shared meals.
Creating Community Through Dinner
Sarah Entwistle shifted from financial work to hosting themed dinners that feel more like family reunions than formal events. She believes that the isolation born from the pandemic has reshaped how people wish to connect. “Meeting in more relaxed settings fosters real conversations,” she notes.
For Carlos N. Hernandez Torres, attending a gathering created a unique opportunity to enjoy good food and new friendships. He prefers these intimate settings to the typical restaurant scene, which he finds to be overpriced for mediocre meals.
Networking Over Dinner
Amber Mayfield, frustrated with networking as a television assistant, started “To Be Hosted” to forge deeper connections over dinner. Guests fill out a survey before each event to guide seating arrangements and enhance interactions.
Mayfield reveals that her events typically attract around 16-20 guests, half of whom usually come solo. The atmosphere encourages genuine conversation, covering a range of topics, all set to the backdrop of live music.
Each dinner showcases different chefs, often with unique cultural influences shining through the menu. Chef Deborah L. Jean highlights how the shared experience of food brings people together, breaking down barriers and fostering a sense of community.
In a city where connection can sometimes feel distant, these dinner parties provide a refreshing alternative, blending great food with the chance to meet new friends.
