Hump Day Vibes with Hilary Duff

Is this your first Wednesday on the new site? That’s exciting! At least now we can comment. I’m curious to see how it all plays out. Before you know it, things will get a bit wild.

Sure, it’s been a week, but, well, I think we’re making progress, right? Seed? Not sure what that means. At least we still have the Instagram feature, which is something, right? If everything else falls apart, we can cling to that.

And then there’s Hilary Duff—can you believe she’s 38? Let’s get on with it.

Welcome to this week’s Hump Day Nightcaps, featuring workout tips from Hilary that might just get suburban moms breaking a sweat. You might want to take some notes here.

Oh, and speaking of which, I have a little request for NFL officials before tomorrow’s draft. Kay Adams is ready to strut her stuff, and Bill Clinton—well, he’s looking as cheerful as ever, but it seems he’s completely checked out.

By the way, I really need someone to buy me some Girl Scout cookies. It’s National Girl Scout Leader Day, and we’re diving into a slightly altered Hump Day “Cap!”

Hilary Duff: Staying Fit at 38

Clearly, we have a soft spot for Girl Scout cookies here. They’re definitely not good for you. I can imagine RFK Jr. must be trying to safeguard his little Scouts after peeking at those ingredient labels.

But hey, they’re delicious! Yes, some might say we’re a bit indulgent, but honestly, nothing screams American more than Girl Scout cookies.

Let’s talk Thin Mints—those are like the reigning champions of the cookie game. They’ve endured the test of time, and no nasty preservatives will ruin that. Tagalongs, Trefoils, Adventurefuls—yep, I had to look those up. Who knew? And I’m a coconut fan, so I thought Samoas would be a hit. Turns out, not so much. Disappointing.

Alright, let’s get into the lesson of the day. I’m changing things up—let’s highlight the main point right off the bat, as the analytics folks might prefer.

So, let’s introduce Hilary Duff, the 38-year-old enjoying a few boxes of Girl Scout cookies, causing a stir among all those MAHA moms.

Bill Clinton’s Good Spirits

Yes! Great to have you in the class, Hilary. By the way, her sister Hayley and her fiancé just made a surprising announcement about their relationship…

It’s off. That’s right—clear-cut, over, finished. Let’s move on!

But that’s not the craziest part…

They were together for 12 years! I mean, how does a 12-year commitment work? Is the plan just to occasionally talk about the wedding for over a decade? I can’t wrap my head around it. Personally, I was engaged to my wife for six months before tying the knot. Twelve years feels like too long to me.

True love seems to have taken a hit here. It’s kind of sad.

Speaking of trends from the ’90s making a comeback…

Draft Day Excitement!

So much going on! If you thought Joe Biden was struggling, Bill Clinton is right there, too. That constant smile is impressive. Can you imagine keeping that up for so long? What do you think Bill’s doing during Jerry’s speech?

And what did Jerry even say? Could someone explain?

“This guy was just picked as the second American to start at… something.”

What does that even mean? Classic Jerry, as always.

Honestly, I had no idea Bill and Jerry were this close. I wonder if Bill will be doing that in the future. Regardless, it’s nice seeing this before the NFL Draft.

And speaking of the draft… let’s turn this Hump Day into an epic night! First up, your annual reminder that “Draft Day” is one of the best sports movies ever.

What a film! Truly, it deserves a solid 10/10. Kevin Costner makes some pretty wild trades, sweats bullets when no one shows up to his No. 1 player’s birthday, and somehow manages to win back all his picks in a spectacular finale.

Oh right! Diddy and Terry Crews are in it, plus Sam Elliott as a head coach and Jennifer Garner playing the front office role. Seriously, it’s flawless.

Now, let’s get back to the real NFL Draft and hear a quick note from Peter Schrager for tomorrow night.

Mock Draft 3.0: Cowboys make bold moves, Jets shore up defense

“Messing up an NFL draft pick isn’t brave.”

Absolutely, Peter. Amen to that! Seriously, screwing up draft picks is what we do every year. It’s mind-boggling.

Some will say it’s on us for using social media during the draft, and I get that. You see it or you don’t. Maybe just enjoy the moment for once.

But as Peter points out, it’s also the fault of all those “insiders” who share info a minute before the pick. What’s the point? Just for clicks, right?

So don’t fall for it. Embrace the draft. It really is an exciting night! I still remember 2020 vividly when the Dolphins picked Tua. I thought it was a slam dunk—I was ecstatic.

Looking back, maybe I should have held back a bit. Ah, well.

That’s all for now. Happy Draft Day Eve to everyone! Take it away, Kay!