It's no wonder that in recent decades, childhood has extended beyond the age of 18 and the age of marriage has moved later.
But some Gen Zers are rebelling by getting married before renting a car.
“I think there was definitely a small movement of people getting married, having children and moving to farms,” Kirsten Moser, a Zoomer who married in her early 20s, told the Post.
on the other hand, National median age of marriage At age 30 for men and 28 for women in the U.S., Kirsten and other baby-faced newlyweds are finding it increasingly difficult to find a partner with shared values due to the high cost of living. If you think about it, it makes sense.
Carsen Stevensen, 24, describes his life in San Francisco's tech industry perfectly. He calls his marriage to his wife Hope, 23, a “startup marriage” rather than a “merger marriage.”
“There seem to be two approaches to marriage,” he said. “One is more foundational, where you're pretty young and don't have a lot of baggage or lifestyle to work with, and you can build that foundation together. The other is more of a merger, where you're an established I'm trying to combine two lifestyles.”
He says he prefers the former model because it offers him and Hope the freedom to make life decisions together without being bound by pre-existing obligations.
The Stevensens, who met at Hinge during the pandemic, married in April 2022 when they were 22 and 21 years old, respectively.
“Marriage can be a source of stability for growing up together, even when you're both quite young,” Kasen told the Post. “But for Gen Z, this message is just a mess, focused more on their career than their family.”
In addition to having “steady friends and companions,” Kasen points out that there are “huge financial advantages” to marrying young, especially in an expensive city like San Francisco. Especially in this economy and this region. ”
Kasen, who now works as a product manager, admits that when he was studying engineering at Stanford University, his marriage was a source of confusion for his classmates.
“I was surprised,” he said. “It was a bit of a culture shock for the other students.
“But we both valued marriage, family, stable relationships, education and hard work,” Kasen said of Hope, who works in advertising. “Luckily, I found a man who loves me and is interested in marriage.''
Similarly, Jacob and Kirsten Moser's similar political beliefs motivated them to marry in October, when they were both 24 years old.
“I think it's very important to have the same core values and outlook on life. And I find that especially these days, that's very rare. So you better hold on to that. And we did,'' says Kirsten, a nurse who shares conservative views. She said she also has an opinion with her husband, who is a contractor.
According to Toward the 2024 report According to the Financial Times, female Zoomers are 30% more liberal than men, making it more difficult than ever to find a like-minded partner.
The Mosers, who grew up in Virginia and now live in Richmond, have been friends for eight years and dated for two years before getting married. Jacob said some of his friends made fun of him for getting married so young.
“A man is a man,” he told the Post. “Some people continue to go to college and do the same thing in their 20s. But others want to settle down and do something bigger.”
Jonny Lee knows he's particularly unusual. Not only did she get married at age 20, but she's also a young professional in Manhattan, where getting married young is especially rare. According to research People in urban areas are less likely to marry early, according to economists at Stanford University and Harvard University at the Equality Opportunity Project.
But the creative director said he noticed that Apparently it's a “trend” to get married young.
“It sounds crazy to call marriage a trend, but most things in life go through these trend cycles,” Johnny told the Post. “This is definitely a recent thing, probably within the past year or so.”
Since marrying her husband Alistair, also 24, in 2020, Johnny has been approached by more young women interested in his story, both in person and on social media.
“I've been seeing more and more of that lately,” she said. “In 2020, that was definitely not the case. People weren't thinking about getting married young, what it would be like, if it was possible, how to get through it.”
She says many people are simply fed up with the idea that their 20s are just a game.
“I think people are tired of seeing the party life and dream life being pushed by the media as the ideal of youth, and they realize that's not what they want. There are people,” Johnny explained.
“Before I got married, I felt like a little boy,” Alistair, a chiropractor, told the Post. “Going through things as a couple with Johnny helped me grow as a person.”
The couple explained that their decision to marry young was due to “circumstances.” Alistair proposed to Johnny a week after learning his mother was going into hospice care for ovarian cancer.
“At the end of the day, we all knew we were going to get married anyway,” Johnny said. “Everything felt so right. I couldn't imagine getting married without my mom.”
Johnny's mother was able to walk him down the aisle, but she died two months later.
Although they didn't intend to get married so young, Johnny and Alistair, who split their time between New York City and New Zealand for work and family, believe it benefited them both greatly.
“Honestly, this has allowed both of us to change direction in our lives faster, because when it comes to getting an apartment, applying for a loan, and everything else we have, “Because you're getting double the income for what you have to do as an adult,” Johnny said, “because it's about money.”
Samantha Patrick married even earlier, becoming a bride five days before her 19th birthday.
“I always wanted to get married soon,” Samantha told the Post. “We're always growing and changing. I want to grow and change with the person I'm with forever.”
Now 22 years old, she lives in Columbus, Ohio with her husband, firefighter Robbi Patrick. He was 23 years old when they married. Ann Unexpected disadvantages of getting married young Many friends were separated.
“They're in a completely different season of life and I can't empathize with them anymore,” she said. “It's so weird. I wasn't expecting that. A lot of people weren't supportive and were angry about you getting married so young.”
Samantha, who works as a nanny, said that when she found out she was getting married in her late teens, she received mean comments from ex-friends, acquaintances, co-workers at her former restaurant, and even strangers on social media. spoke. .
“I've gotten comments like, 'Wow, this is ridiculous. I need to find myself, experience life, and date.' Or, 'You should hire a good divorce lawyer.' she said. “I sometimes receive such advice from divorced people, so I don't think I need your advice.''
While she says she would never criticize anyone who chooses to spend their 20s dating and discovering themselves, she believes those who have made the opposite choice should be given the same respect.
“Some people don't want to sleep with a million people before they get married, and that's okay,” Samantha says. “It should be fine either way.”
