Memoir Reflects on a Unique Homeschooling Experience

Nine-year-old Stephen Merrill Block found himself disliking his new school in Plano, Texas. It felt dull and confining. Things took a turn when his teacher shook him during class for asking too many questions. In response to these frustrations, he began crafting a story about a boy who decides to run away from school. He would often come home and brood for hours until his caring mother picked him up, perhaps to provide comfort during these tough moments.

Then, in 1990, everything changed. His parents decided to withdraw him from school, leaving him shocked when his mother introduced the concept of “homeschooling.” She enthusiastically told him, “It’s like school, but at home—that’s the answer! We need to save the imaginative spark of the next Charles Dickens before traditional school snuffs it out.”

Now 43, Block has penned a memoir detailing those formative years spent under his mother’s unconventional tutelage. Through his reflections, he explores the complexities of that period in his life.

When Block finally entered high school, he found himself woefully underprepared. He describes it as a rough transition—a struggle with a severe lack of social skills and a disheartening report card. The five years preceding high school had been spent, as his mother would say, “pursuing passions”—mostly comprised of reading novels by the pool or spending long hours alone in his room.

His mother’s eccentricity was notable. She did not trust conventional education or medicine and had some rather unusual beliefs, like the idea that “white people can perform mild photosynthesis” or that the shape of one’s ears somehow influenced success in life, which Block recounts in his writing.

After moving from Indianapolis to Plano, his mother grew increasingly distant and frustrated. Days would disappear as she sipped wine and engaged in lengthy conversations over the phone, wandering the house in a detached manner.

This detachment seemed to motivate her to find an alternative to public schooling, something that could improve their bond while addressing her own lethargy.

Their homeschooling approach was quite unconventional. They would sit together at the dining room table for math in the mornings, but the remainder of the day would often be left to “general activities.” This consisted of solitary projects or “errands” with his mother—ranging from thrifting at TJ Maxx to catching a few films or soaking up the sun outside.

When Stephen expressed frustration about not learning enough, his mother would sometimes engage him in quizzes during their pool time, playfully dunking him under water for incorrect answers.

His interactions with peers were infrequent. He joined a taekwondo class, but only because his father would oversee—his mother was worried about the “violent” nature of the class. He also participated in Little League, although his dad became the coach. Unfortunately, his closest friend from elementary school eventually stopped coming around.

Block’s memoir serves not only as a personal narrative but also as a critique of the largely unregulated realm of homeschooling in America.

In 1990, when he left traditional school, homeschooling had just been legalized in Texas, driven by an expanding community of Christian fundamentalists advocating for their right to educate away from what they perceived as the corrupting influences of public education.

However, Block points out that the homeschooling law in Texas came with minimal oversight. Parents didn’t even need to possess a high school diploma, and even those with criminal backgrounds could homeschool without government intervention or checks on their child’s education or well-being—something that remains true today in Texas, renowned for its lenient homeschooling policies.

Block argues that such freedoms can strip children of their agency and leave them vulnerable, as confronting a parent-educator can result in losing their family support and social connections.

Despite these challenges, Block ended up meeting and exceeding academic standards, even winning a science fair and becoming the editor of his high school newspaper. Nevertheless, he struggled for years to break free from the overwhelming influence of his mother and the loneliness that accompanied being isolated at home for those five years.

To him, she was “my only teacher, friend, and entire world.”

To regain some independence, he chose distance. He attended college in Missouri, making choices that could provoke his mother’s disapproval—like gaining weight, drinking beer, painting his nails, and exploring his identity. Yet, she remained steadfastly attached. Eventually, he moved to New York City and published two novels, but when his mother proposed living nearby to support him and his wife with their newborn, he felt it necessary to decline.

She once said, “I wish you weren’t the light of my life, but I can’t help it—you’re incredible. You were always my everything.”

Tragically, she passed away from lung cancer in 2020.

Following her death, Block found himself deeply reflecting on their complicated relationship and realized how her unwavering belief in him shaped his life, even when it seemed delusionally optimistic.

As he eloquently puts it, “Her love may have been the cage in which I was raised, but it was also the key to my own escape.”