aIn early 2000 I moved to Christchurch, New Zealand to study midwifery. As I had previously been a volunteer firefighter I decided to live in my hometown of Lyttelton whilst studying so I could join the local fire brigade.
It had been over ten years since I had lived there, but not much had changed. It still had that country-town feel where everyone knew each other. I attended night training with the brigade and recognized some of the faces. They were the same as before, just a little older. Behind me stood a tall, handsome young man. I recognized him as Grant. He had a very shy, serious look on his face, but when he laughed, it was like he lit up. His mother and my mother had been friends in their youth, but we weren't in the same circles. I was seven years older than him, and we went to different schools.
There was an event at the fire station, and I'd been with the fire department for a few months, so I had a few drinks, got up the courage, and danced with Grant to Neil Diamond's “Forever in Blue Jeans.” By the end of the night, I was a little unsteady on my feet, but Grant was the gentleman who walked me home.
A few days later, he called me and asked me to go to the movies with him. He later said that he had to pick up and hang up the phone several times before he was able to make a call (phones with handsets were the norm at the time).
The date was “nice,” not shocking, and I could tell he was nervous, but there was an attraction between us. We went to see the Bruce Willis movie “The Whole Nine Yards,” which was a good choice since I'm a fan of his action movies. (A few years later, I bought the DVD of this movie as an anniversary present.)
I was 32, a single mother with a 7-year-old son, and had no intention of settling down. I had goals and plans for the future that didn't include marriage or more children, and I truly believed that ship had sailed. Grant was 25, had just returned from a trip overseas, and was ready to take off again. Like me, he had no intention of settling down anytime soon.
On their second date, Grant took his son, Jesse, ice skating. It was Jesse's first time on the rink, so Grant held his hand as he skated backwards, helping guide him across the ice while everyone else sprinted around him. Grant was calm and caring, making Jesse feel valued and safe. I was really touched by that.
It was a very strange feeling. I had never thought about marriage, but in that moment, watching Grant patiently teach my son how to skate, I knew he was a really good guy and I didn't want to let him go. He was the one.
The next day, my friends asked me how the date went, and I surprised them, and myself, by saying, “I'm going to marry him and have his babies.”
Six weeks later we were engaged, and nine months later we were married on the hottest February day of the year, under a giant Kahikatea tree, with our son as groomsman, friends, family, and dogs, and a band playing Neil Diamond for our first dance together as husband and wife.
Soon after, we bought our first home. I was amazed at how much Grant's life had changed in just a year. He went from a young single man with a two-seater sports car to a wife and a young son with a mortgage and a baby on the way. I always said he was lucky to have big shoulders because he had a lot to carry.
We have built a beautiful, chaotic life together, through the good and the bad. We have 6 amazing children, lots of animals and live in a beautiful place in New Zealand. 24 years later, his smile still lights up my world. He will always be “the one” and we still dance to Neil Diamond songs together.
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