Gen Z Embraces “October Theory”

Members of Gen Z are starting to embrace what they’re calling “October Theory,” which aims to create a second New Year’s Eve in October focused on health aspirations.

A recent report reveals that for many in this generation, dating is increasingly influenced by financial factors. Nearly one in three singles born between 1997 and 2012 have admitted to going on dates primarily for a free meal, according to a survey by Intuit involving 1,500 U.S. adults conducted last month.

The report highlights that money is molding relationships more than ever, affecting everything from budgeting for dates to determining who picks up the tab. A significant 51% of Americans report cutting back on dating due to finances, with Gen Z feeling the impact the most at 58%. But paradoxically, this shift has prompted many to redefine “good” dating in terms of affordability and creativity.

“For Gen Z, discussions about financial habits are becoming a new form of love language,” noted Ashley Ewald, a public policy student at Georgia Tech. She expressed that money symbolizes stability within dating.

A Deloitte study from earlier this year found that nearly half of both Gen Z and Millennials do not feel financially secure. Ewald mentioned that budget-friendly dates—like making dinner at home or collaborating on side hustles—are becoming the norm, especially amid ongoing inflation and living cost pressures.

“Girls have to eat.”

The Intuit survey suggested that a budget between $50 and $100 is considered reasonable for a first date. This sentiment resonates with Katie Feitz, a 22-year-old media professional from Jacksonville, Florida.

Feitz remarked, “Girls have to eat, but they won’t just go out with anyone for a free meal. Usually, the risk outweighs the reward.” While she is open to splitting costs or buying drinks, she expects effort back.

“If you can’t afford a $15 drink, don’t ask someone out,” Feitz continued. “I want to date ambitious people who have direction, not necessarily those with a high income, but at least someone who knows what they want.”

Like many of her peers, Feitz prefers casual, low-cost outings such as coffee or beach walks over pricier dinners.

Jason Lee, founder of LoveTrack—a dating app offering date suggestions and conversation starters—observed that Gen Z is becoming more inventive and budget-conscious with date ideas. Some popular picks on the app include scavenger hunts and home movie nights, which don’t strain the wallet.

Alison Guilbeault, a mental health therapist who works with Gen Z clients in New York City, noted the current flexibility in sharing expenses, like splitting restaurant bills or buying individual drinks, has become standard practice.

“Younger generations may not even flinch at what constitutes a cheap date, unlike those of us from earlier eras,” she observed.

However, financial issues can often become the “third wheel” in relationships, with one-third of Americans admitting to ending relationships due to money concerns. Also, 44% of Gen Z daters expressed they would only date those who have a higher salary than them.

Sabrina Romanoff, a psychologist specializing in relationships at the dating app Highly, commented that while economic dynamics in dating aren’t new, they are indeed more pronounced. Historically, women often dated men with equal or greater educational and financial backgrounds, and now dating has become increasingly transactional.

Over half of individuals surveyed (57% of women and 63% of men) would stop seeing someone who can’t handle their finances, with many finding frugality attractive.

Reflecting on the past, Guilbeault recalled that in her college days, it was common to seek out free food, drinks, or even free vacations as part of dating culture. She remembered her and her friends from earlier years using their charm to cover dinner tabs.

For many young people, achieving financial independence is now viewed as the key to security in relationships. Intuit found that more than half maintain separate bank accounts and prioritize individual financial management.

Financial expert Taylor Price remarked, “When we enter exclusive relationships, we start asking about salaries because we know that love can’t pay the bills.” She emphasized that for her generation, conversations around money are crucial from the outset, especially given their experience with the economic challenges brought about by the pandemic.

In short, “free food is more than just a meal—it’s about one less expense in a world where financial pressures abound.”