Dear Abby: I suspect my wife might have had an affair a few years back. She often spent weekends at a local bar with this guy. Recently, I confronted her about the rumors, and she insisted she hadn’t done anything wrong. But then, one day, she started talking about him in her bedroom, getting really emotional. She cried and praised him as kind and sweet, but claims she hardly knew him.
If you can find the truth, perhaps forgiveness will follow. Interestingly, that man has now passed away. Any advice would really help. — believe it or not
Dear “Trust me”: A deceased drinking companion—kind and gentle—who was perhaps just an empathetic listener still remembered fondly by your wife likely poses no threat to your marriage. My suggestion is to let go of past grievances and focus on your current relationship; dwelling on old issues isn’t beneficial.
Dear Abby: My wife died after a long illness. We were married for 51 years, and losing her has brought on a whirlwind of emotions. I’m not really looking for advice since I know things will improve over time.
She was our family photographer, and we have countless photos, yet there are very few of her in recent years. This is for our children and grandchildren: take photos of your loved ones. Don’t wait for the next opportunity—tomorrow might be too late. — get image
Get the photo: I’m truly sorry for your loss and understand your desire for memories captured in pictures. In today’s world, with most people carrying smartphones, let’s not leave that responsibility to just one person. We should all make the effort to capture those moments.
Dear Abby: I’ve been with my boyfriend for a decade, but he never shows me any affection. If I get hurt, he tends to respond with, “Why did you do that?” He claims to love me, yet I don’t feel loved at all. Recently, it’s been over six months without any intimacy.
I met someone who actually asks about my day, what I’ve eaten, and how I’m feeling. It feels nice to be seen. I’m wondering, if I open up to this person, am I emotionally cheating? — Something’s missing in Michigan
Missing people: A man who has not expressed any kind of affection in 10 years, doesn’t acknowledge your pain, and hasn’t been physically close for half a year isn’t really showing love—or even liking you, to be honest. It’s not considered cheating to respond to someone who fulfills emotional needs. If this new relationship grows beyond friendship, perhaps it’s time to reconsider your current relationship.
