From the beginning The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, It was clear that there were two opposing camps: Team Taylor-Frankie-Paul and Team Whitney Leavitt. By the end of the season, Leavitt had cemented herself as the series' villain, with some arguing that Jen Affleck's husband, Zach Affleck, was a close second. But despite Leavitt's attempts to topple Paul as the queen bee of #MomTok, Paul isn't about to let her enemies dry up as her friends while she's “getting slammed the hell out” online.
“She was the first person to help me out in those dark places where I was being bullied online,” Paul told DECIDER about the aftermath of the swinger scandal, “and she was the only person to reach out to make sure I was OK and that she was there for me.”
So the content creator wants to be that same kind of friend to Leavitt, even if the backlash she's currently facing is “self-inflicted.”
“I've been through it too and I have feelings and I'm hurt,” she added, “so regardless of how she feels about me, I just want to be there for her at this time.”
Meanwhile, Macy Neely was “really annoyed” with Leavitt, who posted screenshots of text messages on the show that seemed to be an attempt to make Neely a “liar” for claiming that she didn't receive any messages from Leavitt the day she missed the launch party.
As calls for a second season grow, Paul and Neely both said they were “in favor” of filming again, but Neely, who stood by Leavitt when the other women opposed it, explained what he would do differently.
“I think I'm going to be more vocal and assertive in certain situations that I would have definitely held back in the past,” she admitted, “but I'm really going to learn a lot.”
When the two women stopped by the DECIDER offices last week, they spoke about misconceptions about themselves, the feedback they've received from fellow Mormons, and our “post and ghost” policy. Check out the full interview below.
Decision maker: The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives has officially been released. What did you think when you first saw the show? Was there anything that surprised you?
Macy Neely: She hasn't seen it yet.
Taylor Frankie Paul: I know I’m late to the game.
Macy: I watched it. Watching it, for me, it felt like a highlight reel of what was shot, because there was so much to shoot. So to see it all wrapped up in just eight episodes, I was like, wow, that was quick. There was a lot that got cut for story reasons. So it was really cool to see how it all came together and how the story was told. But yeah, I thought it was amazing.
Before the show started, members of the church were very critical of the show. Since it started, have you received any feedback from friends and family who are devout Mormons?
Macy: Since it first came out, people have been judging the book by its cover, but when they actually looked at it, they realized, “Oh, it's not what it seems at all,” and so I feel like it's getting more positive reviews. I think it looks better. I haven't heard any negative feedback from the church since it came out.
Taylor: Actually, I think it was very good. I got a lot of compliments like, “Your show was great.” [and] He just said, “I loved your show.” I was shocked that he'd already seen it and liked it. I also thought it was going to be a fun girl and mom show, so it was good to see that it was being watched by a variety of age groups. And a lot of men were watching it and liking it, too. That was kind of surprising. It's kind of like a soap opera, and it was good to see that they liked it, too.
The internet loves to chat. Do you both feel there are any misconceptions about yourselves or your families that you'd like to clarify now?
Taylor: It wasn't so much for Dakota. I never watched the show, but he binge-watched it the first night it aired because he was nervous about how it was structured. And I think he feels like it's showing a different side of him. So, I don't know. He was just saying that he never showed me his softer side, the part where he was really sweet and gentle with me, or the strict part. So he was like, “I hope one day I'll have a chance to show that side of myself.”
I saw a TikTok that he made and I think he was like, “Oh, season 2, I guess.”
Taylor: Well, he's not too upset, which is good, but I feel like he wants some time to show his good side too.
Let's take a look at some of the drama: Taylor, how do you feel about Whitney now, and if she decides to come back, will you welcome her back onto #MomTok?
Taylor: For me, Whitney and I get along well and I thought we were on the same page. I can't say it today, but like I said today, she was the first one to help me out in the dark places where I was being bullied online. She was the only one to reach out and ask if I was OK, and she was there for me, so I want to do that for her. So now she's going through a lot online. Even if it's something she brought on herself, I've been through it too, and I have feelings and I'm hurting. So regardless of how she feels about me, I just want to be there for her at this time.
Macy, you're still close with Whitney. How did you feel about her posting your text messages on TikTok?
Macy: Yeah, well, I was very annoyed that she did that. It's a trust issue. There's nothing bad in the messages. But it's a private message between us, so if you're going to share it, you should have gotten my permission first. And honestly, I didn't understand what she was doing with that message, because she was hiding the top date message. So I was like, that's what the problem was. Still, it's obvious that you didn't text me the night of my event. It seemed like she was doing that to call me a liar. But again, her not texting me the night of my event proved my point. So, I don't know where we are now. I thought we were doing well. I reached out to her the night of the premiere and said, “I hope you're doing well,” because I was starting to see that she was already getting criticism. And I knew that she'd probably already seen the whole show. She didn't write back. So, I mean, I don't know. I thought it was okay, but it seems like it's not. I don't know.
Taylor, it seems like a lot of people who watch the show sympathize with you, which is a stark contrast to the public opinion after the Swinging Scandals. Were you surprised by how many people were on your side?
Taylor: Yes. Not this time. I was actually talking to her about this in the car. I was the villain for so long, so I understand how Whitney feels. So it's new for me to not be the villain. And I love it. Again, I never really saw how I was portrayed. But I feel like I learned my lesson, and I was really sad and I felt responsible for everything that I did. So I didn't know how I would be portrayed as a villain on the show, because at that point, I had given up. Honestly, I was really sad about where I was. So it was great to at least get to know that side of my story, where I came from and how I got there. It wasn't like a snap of my fingers. [and] So did I. I feel like there's a reason why people behave the way they do.
You've been through something, taken responsibility, and grown from it, which makes you very relatable. That's what makes you human.
Taylor: Yes. And I'm glad I was able to show that. [happened]Nobody would have seen it and they probably still had this image of me as some kind of scandal or something. [that I’m] Bad mother. That was my idea, that was my headline. So it was so great to have the opportunity to show that there's more to me than just the headline.
There are so many that it's almost too much to fit on TikTok!
Taylor: Well, it was really good for me. I think it was a good opportunity for me.
What did you guys think about Jen agreeing to move to New York and do you think she'll continue to participate in #MomTok from the East Coast?
Macy: Yeah. So they ended up going to Arizona. I think they changed course at the last minute and went to Arizona.
Taylor: I won't reveal it, but there is some movement..
Macy: There's a lot going on behind the scenes… I can't say anything more, you'll have to wait until season 2 to find out.
Taylor: Well, to answer your question, I'm not sure if they'll end up going to New York or not, so I'm not sure.
The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City Season 5 premieres next week. Have you heard from any women who want to help welcome #MomTok into the world of reality TV?
Macy: Well, we just met Meredith. [Marks] In the hallway. So I guess we were asking her for advice.
Taylor: Yeah. We were like, “How do you handle the press and the travel and everything?” and she was like, “You'll get used to it.” That was good advice. And I think she was also trying to tell me not to take things too seriously. That was good, because the first time, you're nervous and you put everything on the line and you don't know. She's the only one we've met. I don't know any of them.
Macy: Me too.
I'm sure you'll all see each other soon.
Macy: Crossover sounds fun.
What is your policy regarding the comments section of your #MomTok videos? Do you read them all or do you “post and ignore”?
Taylor: Both. I participate, I post, I interact for a little while, and then I just thank people for their support. Obviously, when it gets to the point where it's too much, I eventually stop participating and I quit. So I feel like I only interact for a little while at the beginning.
Macy: If it starts going viral, it'll feel like it's going to be so overwhelming that it's out of hand, which is not possible.
Taylor: I always honestly thank them for the support because at the end of the day, I need to put my phone down, spend time with my family, and touch some grass.
Macy: Staring at a screen all day is not good for your mental health. There is a lot of negative as well as positive feedback. I feel like if you only look at negative stuff, it's not good for your health.
Taylor: But I don't like posting and ghosting either. I think it's different for everyone. But I think you owe your success to those people because they support you and they're there for you and your story. And I think you should be grateful for those people just being there for you.
Have you heard any updates on season 2 yet? If it gets the green light, what would you like to see in season 2?
Taylor: I don't know if that will happen, that's up to Rob Mills. Of course we would love to do that and I think we would both be in favor of that. So what can we offer? That's a good question.
Macy: I learned a lot in season one, and I learned how it all works, and I think it's probably made me more vocal and assertive in certain situations that I would have definitely held back in the past, but I learned a lot anyway.
Taylor: Yeah, it feels like that. But for me, it felt totally different because I was so exhausted while we were shooting. I was pregnant and I was literally close to giving birth. I gave birth. So I think it was hard for me to just enjoy the moment and actually be present for everything. So, like I was saying all day, for me it feels like a third person is coming out.
Macy: Her third personality.
Taylor: My third personality! Because I feel like I've seen two. So my third personality is coming..
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives It's currently streaming on Hulu.
